View from a barstool 24

I’ve finally been freed from the EBF stationery cupboard if I agreed to watch all of Goldibollocks London Mayoral campaign videos and read all the daily Email’s/begging letters coming from said mayor/emperor/High priest/Prime Minister/Dictator (delete as appropriate) and after doing this I have this to report..’

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaa

So Goldilocks, Screechy and a whole host of biffers are after the London vote using the “voice” they have been given by the media to put out a joke party political broadcast, and issue some tatty election pamphlets along with their equivalent of the Sun newspaper (both equally discredited and hated amongst the majority of this fine country). In it they tell us how they will get Britain out of the EU and stop immigration, amongst others, both of which the London Mayor and assembly have no say on whatsoever. They seem to be libelling, slandering and being downright racist to the bookies favourite who treats them like something you pick up of the bottom of your shoe after an errant dog owner left it on the pavement. He also once again takes an ex-soldier and uses him in his nasty propaganda. Again this is against the wishes of his family and again the biffer lie that there is no memorial to him. There is. It’s what the family wanted, where the family wanted it to be. Once again we won’t name him as the last thing his relatives want is for him him to become the battlefield in a political ‘tug of war’.

A day out in Bexley Heath handing out faaasands of leaflets was videoed and photographed. Nothing about this leads me to believe that anyone wants anything to do with Goldibollocks and his tawdry little party. They have already had both barrels from the written media describing the campaign as a car crash.

The radio broadcast they were permitted was a 30 second recording, the TV broadcast 5 minutes of absolute comedy and still they aren’t happy. We’ve seen the full version of the broadcast Goldibollocks wanted and no wonder the Beeb and ITV told them no. Usually after a broadcast a party’s showing in the polls jumps, this time it didn’t. I checked Comres before and a couple of days later (you need to do something while perched on the loo). The votes for Goldibollocks for London Mayor stayed at 1% and the seats in the assembly, where in my view they were really putting their faith,a big fat zero.

So then to the daily begging bowl, sorry Emails, to their supporters asking them to “chip in” to raise the £20 faaaasand needed to reach even more Londoners with their bullshit and lies. With just (as I write) 8 days to go even if they meet the target it will be too late. It seems to us here that a good holiday will be in order after the campaign and spending money for Screechy’s addiction will be getting a boost from the gullible disciples.
So here’s a thing Goldibollocks and Screechy, Pieman Steve, Chief of Staff Lomax, Sargeant, and the rest of your high command, here’s some advice from a Landlord who used to live and work in London. I’ll even give it to you for free, although the team could do with some hobnobs (the coffers are bare and Sainsbury’s own just don’t taste the same)

1) if you really want to become mayor and Screechy a member of the assembly, don’t fuck off around half of the London electorate with racism and lies. In one of the most diverse and multi cultural cities in the world the voters won’t really like it..

2) When a family of a murdered man asks you not to use his memory to further your racist, islamaphobic aims, don’t. It pisses a lot of people off and a lot of these pissed off people will be voters.

3) when slagging off the favourite for the Mayoral job (Not you Goldibollocks, not you) don’t use his religion against him or at least if you do get your facts right. Whether a bloke is Muslim, Christian, Athiest, Hindu or whatever, fight him on his policies. Oh scratch this one, you haven’t got any policies that affect Londoners just the same old shit that you purvey on your Social Media page.

4) when you lose, when Screechy loses, when your family loses and you all lose your deposits, blame the media, the establishment, the people that don’t fall for your cack and us (and other pages like us) fuck off, pack up your bollocks and close up. It is a show that this is Britain, a Britain that I want to live in, with Naz Hussain next door to me and George Shah just down the road, with the little old lady at number 21 who Naz helps with her garden, with Jeff, one of my locals, from Trinidad, who loves talking to me about my love of Cricket and warm beer, with Steve the local white Van man who hates life but loves all the mates at the pub and finally with the followers of Exposing Britain first who see through your lies at every turn.

This is my advice to you, this is my wish. That after you lose and are humiliated at the elections you go away and leave the sensible silent majority alone. I may even be minded to “chip in” to help.

Cheers

Politicians who don’t understand politics

According to The Guardian, Donald trump has messed up in the American ‘primaries’ because he doesn’t understand the electoral system – and apparently nobody could be bothered to tell him. He’s managed to get a lot of people to like him on social media and he’s had a lot turning up to rallies but when it can to the crunch he didn’t tell them to vote for the representatives who would vote for him in the next stage.

Of course his reaction is predictable. He blames a corrupt electoral system when really the problem is his own stupidity. He doesn’t understand the system and is too arrogant to ask.

We know someone else like that. Well, apart from the lots of people turning up to rallies part!

 

The Mayoral debate (innit?) by Landlord

Picture the scene, Goldibollocks marching into a (real) TV studio, with his henchmen to meet Screechy’s bestie Nick Robinson. The prospective mayoral candidates are all being granted a 20 minute interview and Der Fuhrer and his shittroopers are on their way for their turn. In front of a TV audience of several Goldibollocks, looking like the thug statesman he wants to be is getting made up ready for his chance to shine.

The announcer. Welcome to all of you tuning into this q&a between Nick Robinson and Mr Goldibollocks of the biffer party, keeping Britain British and all that innit. Lady and Gentleman please welcome Mr Robinson and Mr Goldibollocks.

(cue Benny Hill music)

 

1. NR. Good afternoon Mr Goldibollocks
2. That’s just what I expect from you lefty journalists calling everyfink afternoon. In Britain it’s now evening, it’s already a muzzie conspiracy, I thought screechy told you that down in Rochester.
3. Well in my defence I didn’t know who she was.
4. See another conspiracy from the biased lefty media against our legitimate political party. She’s the darling of Britain and I didn’t move in with her just to be able to get on the ballot paper, oh no, that’s down to those bastards at EBF that is, those people will hang when we take over power HAHAHAHAHA.
5. You can’t go around hanging anyone who disagrees with…..
6. (shouting to Lomax) Commander in Chief take his name for the hanging list
7. Can I start the interview now Mr Goldibollocks
8. So you have applied to be Mayor of London and your family and deputy are up for the London Assembly. Can I start by asking why?

PG Well we was having a beer down the Old Dog and Duck and that Mooselimb Sid Khan was on the tv giving it all that. Then I was having a Cuzzer with Screechy and the high command I almost spat my Korma out when they said anyone could be Mayor. I told my muckers to find out all about it, get it funded by our twelvty million gullible supporters, and Jims my Uncle here I am.

1. But that’s not a real reason?
2. You’re already trying my patience, you appeaser. I want to take my party into oblivion obviously.
3. We had a look at your accounts and there seems to be more holes in there than substance, if you can’t manage your own accounts how can London trust you with a budget of Billions?
4. Well Stevie is no good a keeping banners but seems to be able to do our accounts. We use the Barings bank method and hide our heads in the sand. If anyone questions us we have our back up plan…ban the burka, no more mosques, no more halal.
5. But there is a budget of 16billion last year how will this be distributed?
6. Ban the Burka, no more Halal, No more mosques.
7. What is the total amount you, as an individual, earned from Britain First including salary and expenses?
8. Well I had a good year last time out. The gullible fools on our Facebook Page provided all that the high command required to live on. I mean look at Screechy’s tits they ain’t cheap. And hiring a pool hall for an evening that ain’t a couple of quid.
9. You call them gullible fools aren’t they going to see through you now.
10. Most of them are bought likes, the others are mostly from the US who think they can vote!! The money keeps rolling in it’s great!!

(A loud wail is heard as Screechy shouts)

Screechy. Goldi!!! Shut the fuck up for God’s sake!

1. Given that except for Jayda every BF candidate this May is either a relative or neighbour of your mother – this is just ‘jobs for the boys’ style nepotism isn’t it?
2. Have you seen the rules for the election, must have been drawn up by some lefty muslim. I mean how can I get my high command in when they don’t live in London. My Ma and family are fully behind me and if I knew what nepotism meant I’ll hang you.
3. If indeed Britain First is a Christian organisation, why does almost every Christian branch reject Britain First, and why does Britain First speak ill of certain Archbishops, when they have gone against Britain First?
4. No one is more Christian than us, No One I tell you, have you seen our triumphant marches with our crosses. The other branched of Christianity are nothing but libtards and unwashed lefty muslim appeasers who will be hung so High Priestess Screechy can take her rightful place on the throne.
5. Why does Britain First not talk out against white, English (and often Christian) criminals (including terrorists), when they expect Muslims to denounce Muslim criminals (including terrorists) every 30 minutes?
6. Because white christians never ever break the law. In fact when I am leader of the universe all white christian crime will be wiped from the record books, as long as you hold a cross or a bible you will have done nothing wrong. And if you wear fleeces with our emblem you get to stone a muzzie.
7. Why does Britain First continue knowingly to flout the law, and then get annoyed when they have been caught?
8. Ban the burka, no more mosques and Ban Halal.
9. If IS are deemed to be true Muslims by BF, due to following the Qur’an very literally, does this mean that BF are not true Christians as Jayda should not be speaking according to very literal text ?
10. Not in our Bible…the Biffer cherry picked verses bible.
11. There is criticism that you have tried to say that only Muslim men are capable of grooming and sexual offences against minors yet one of your own is on the sex offenders register. What do you say to those who raise this issue?
12. Well Nick you lefty, ban the burka, ban Halal and stop building mosques.
13. This is going well. How about this question. how will you maintain the status quo in the capital with its diverse multi culturalism?
14. Status Quo! I liked ‘Whatever you want’.
15. The question still stands
16. Well seeing as I’m building a wall just inside the M25 to stop anyone slightly multi-cultural or foreign-looking getting in… London for the British. Ban Halal, Ban the burka and stop building mosques.
17. So that’s the sum total of the Biffer manifesto then, Ban the Burka, Ban Halal and close all mosques.
18. Not at all. We stand for more pies for Stevie, free tit jobs for all Biffer high command, new banners, Freedom of the City for Uncle Jim. Loads really.
19. You are having rallies outside the capital. As people not in the capital can’t vote isn’t this a little silly?
20. This is where you lefty media types are wrong. All our millions of followers can vote for us, postal vote forms are being posted to America, Coventry is a well known area of London and we will not be stopped. It’s all lefty Muslim appeasers that have stopped non Londoners from voting and we will not stand for it.

1. What happens if you don’t win and all this has been a tremendous waste of money?
2. Uncle Jim has already told us we will win and he’s never wrong. I mean we have Knights and shit behind us. And if we don’t it will be because the vote has been rigged by the establishment to keep us out.
3. So to sum up your attempt at seizing control of the capital, you will ban the burka, ban Halal, tear down the mosques, kick out anyone non-white, rape the banks, put banners up, buy more pies, make a hate preacher ‘Freeman of the city’, hang lefty’s and screw this great capital into the ground.
4. About right, but I’d also make the admins and followers of Exposing Britain First watch our compendium of videos of Screechy until they repent.
5. Well I’d like to thank you for this interview. Like to, but I can’t, you useless bunch of spunktrumpets.

Not quite Dick Whittington but Golding does have a cat

We have to admit we didn’t think they’d get this far. Fuhrer Golding and his financier, Jim Dowson really have managed to wrangle some more financial backing out of their ‘anonymous’ donors. Not only that, it didn’t all go on acquiring pies for Lewis and kebabs for Paulie. Consequently Der Fuhrer really has got himself registered as a candidate for the London elections.

Not that he stands much of a chance. His previous ‘political’ activity as a BNP local councillor (how telling is that?) left an awful lot to be desired. The residents of Swanley were certainly less than impressed.

And yet here he is listed as a candidate for one of the most significant elected offices in the country, following his vast experience of a single, insignificant term on a small local council.

To stand such an obvious no-hoper in such an important election shows a real contempt for the office of Mayor and for the people of London who undoubtedly deserve someone much more competent and experienced than Golding. But that’s not the half of it. Have a look at the list of candidates Britain First is standing for the London Assembly. What sort of political party is so desperate for credible (ahem) members that they need to draft in the leader’s extended family to make up the numbers?

Nepotism rules in fascist political hierarchies and Britain First certainly fit the fascist bill with their incessant nationalism (even making ‘Putting British people first’ their election slogan) and utter contempt for everyone, British or not who isn’t both white and politically Far-right. They’d even go as far as to hang anyone who disagrees with them given the chance to do so. That’s probably why they couldn’t get any serious politicians to stand for them and had to rely on Paulie’s relatives instead.

According to Brian Furth Golding’s household pets were disqualified on the grounds that they’re household pets (shame)

Actually that’s just as well since Golding’s cat, Fluffy is thinking of turning to Islam. Can you imagine the furore that would create in the Biffer camp?

Of course none of these no-hopers have any chance of being elected to the London Assembly and Golding’s money-men will just have to cut their losses as the exchequer accepts their candidates’ lost deposits due to insufficient support. That’s hardly surprising given that this is Folding Golding’s idea of a serious electioneering statement…

“Londoners should vote for me and Britain First because this is London’s last stand. We’re now a minority in our own city because of mass immigration. Islamic extremism is running rampant in the streets of London and we are the only political party that’s stood up against Islamic extremism.”

He’s not exactly helping the fascist cause with a multicultural electorate who become more and more alienated from the Biffers every time Der Fuhrer opens his mouth. Londoners understand multi-culturalism and its benefits far more accurately than Golding and Fransen ever will. They also understand how tragic it is when minorities are abused, something both Folding & Dutchy should know only too well given their family histories. Dutchy is the product of Dutch and Jewish immigrants whilst Golding’s family heritage is the travelling community (ironically both Jews and travellers are popular targets of hatred and discrimination from rank and file Biffers who presumably didn’t get the memo).

Pretty much everybody else does understand the evils of racial and religious hatred though which is why displays of support for diversity are always much better attended than the Biffers’ mean-spirited displays of bigotry.

All the Biffers ever do in the capital is turn up and cause trouble. Whether they’re baiting Muslims in their Mosques or insulting ethnic Londoners with their ‘(un)Christian patrols’, Golding and his gang of thugs make a nuisance of themselves wherever they go. Theirs would not be a harmonious capital – it would be a city divided against itself or at best, disrupted by the unfair policies of an unpopular regime.

For all these reasons we know that the people of London will make sure that Der Fuhrer, Dutchy Fransen and their assorted friends and relatives suffer a humiliating defeat this May. After all – what respectable Western city would elect anyone whose policies so clearly reflect their ideological, Nazi heritage?

View from a barstool in the cellar

The landlady and the kids are with the in-laws and I’m left here drinking the profits and suffering from a dose of fash fatigue. Being an admin on Exposing Britain First and the constant cases of islamophobic bullshit from the Fuhrer bunker does get us down. The bombs in Belgium are hard to stomach with wall to wall media coverage, security experts telling us what is happening even though it’s just conjecture and the arses in Bifferland lapping it up and providing the propaganda they need to play on the fears of already scared people. The right wing newspapers and our wonderful TV news stations helping them with their recruitment.

But where was the right wing and media angst as bombs were set off in Iraq, in Turkey and other places in Africa and the world. Did you even hear of these as I certainly didn’t, I didn’t see an outpouring of grief on Facebook, didn’t see people changing their profiles to a Turkish flag or an Iraqi one or any other to be honest. The right have even gone as far as to put the disgusting murders in Belgium as a reason for Brexit. Just like the Muslims we have had to put out the same old tired statement of us abhorring the bombings and saying that Daesh are a bunch of murderous bastards whom we are against. My brother works and lives in Brussels, and his workplace is near enough opposite to the station that was bombed. The overwhelming mantra coming from his fellow staff, from many different European nations, is that this was not a Muslim attack but a Daesh one.

With that out of the way (but not forgotten) back to the Fuhrer and his high command. Steve Lewis arrested and bailed for wearing a political uniform had us in stitches. Poor old Pieman, losing a banner last year, being moved down the pecking order in the shittrooper numbers, having to do the seemingly dodgy accounts on a 60’s typewriter and leader of the South East Brigade and now nicked. Steve is one of the more articulate Biffers but even he has slowly been indoctrinated into Bifferdom and writes more and more religious claptrap. We know he reads the page so Steve, hope you enjoyed the 16 hours in the cells. We hope you will be trusted enough to hold the banners again.

What else? Oh yeah, the mayoral election, begging letters, and some religious memes for the sheeple to eat up.

Goldibollocks is on the march going round trying to find 10 idiots in each borough of London to back him, even tweeting because Enfield Council had the audacity of making him hold on the phone, assumingly to get hold of the voters roll. Three of my friends who live in the London Mayoral area have asked that the Biffers do not get their names and addresses as they do not wish to have racist literature through their doors and also they feel that the Fuhrer bunker will use this for more sinister means. I’ll give an update shortly on how they got on.

So it appears that Goldibollocks and Screechy made their target to stand in the elections. They still accuse the Labour candidate of being an extremist Muslim and that London is no longer British. The great thing about this is that London is such a diverse, multi-cultural, thriving capital that will consign them to where my mates will put their propaganda, in the bin.

If you read the Biffer page, I realise that this is hard for you, you will have seen the furore and foam-fest of the sheeple over the apparent removal of the word ‘Easter’ on Cadbury’s Easter oval things. Apparently this was to appease Muslims who quite frankly couldn’t give a toss about it. They have more important things to worry about (islamaphobia, being chucked off planes, securing mosques from right wing fucknuggets). The Daily Star had a front page spread about it and the Biffers were not amused. However a quick phonecall to Cadbury’s and a totally harassed customer services lady told me that this was the biggest load of crap she had ever seen. They may have taken off the word Easter from the front of the packaging but the word appears 4 times in various places.

Coming so soon after the hot cross buns and Kingsmill saga’s it seems that once again Bifferland is foaming over a headline and not the story.

So that’s the week in a nutshell, just an ordinary week in the world of EBF, from bombs to Easter eggs, you couldn’t make it up… Could you?

Cheers

View from a barstool #17

Here we go again, in spite of some reports EBF towers is still standing, despite a rampage by the Hulk and Tankgirl trying to find Ant’s secret stash of muffins. ACAS has been called in as Prole, Kit, #7 and Mama sit giggling in the corner over the number of biffers in Dewsbury. I’m sitting in my car keeping out of it as I have brought a crate of helium lager but think this might go a bit far. Also despite the best efforts of Britain First I am still married. This week I have hidden myself in the crisps store to write the blog with a gag on so my chuckles cannot be heard.

As I write 130 right wing so called patriots saw the light and descended on Dewsbury for what Goldibollocks and Dutchy tried to tell us would be their biggest yet! Although in Biffer terms they will probably tell us that 130 thousand hundred million have marched, flags and police appear to have outnumbered them once again. The police seem to have taken to the idea that no protesters could protest and they seem to have marched unopposed. I’m sure the EBF admins that have been there will give a better report so best leave it to them.

The Huff post also seem to have started an early campaign against the biffers. In their blog report today all denominations of Christians have come out against them and said the so-called Christian call to arms that Goldibollocks preaches is against all of their faiths. I would think that the only Christians that would agree with these vile individuals are in the Westboro Baptist church.

Earlier this week the biffer cowards went to Luton, to Bury Park which has a large Muslim population. They went with their crosses, stab vests and racist propaganda, without informing the police, with the sole intention of stirring up trouble and making a heavily edited video of it. I cannot see anywhere that eggs were thrown but I did see Dutchy arguing with a muslim lady about her attire. Dutchy screamed and the lady stood her ground despite the fact that she was cornered with her two children by the shittroopers. Dutchy seems to think that this was a victory but she would. The Christian parishes around Bury Park issued an apology and gave out roses and a statement saying that the biffers should stay away.

Holocaust Memorial Day caused some issues on the page, as we published ‘never again’. There was an eerie silence from Biffer towers until late on in the day. We had a denier on the page but he was nowhere near as repugnant as some of the biffer sheep who decided that Holocaust day would be better remembered as the day to open the camps again for muslims and leftard do gooders (i.e us). Once again the true side of bifferdom was revealed.

Now I’ve calmed down a bit and the Landlady has gone to the cash and carry, I can report on two of the many things that have made me chortle this week. Firstly the video report of Goldibollocks in the “new Britain First TV studio” (in fact a £15 app from shuttlecock but allow them their delusions of grandeur) telling us how Dewsbury was going to be the biggest (cock up) demo of all time. Once again I couldn’t watch it all (don’t tell Prole or Kit or my hobnob ration will be severely curtailed) but let my fellow EBFers rip it apart. I can’t watch their video’s or “TV” appearances as they usually turn up on the days a certain barmaid works and I would be divorced pdq.

Secondly, the triumphant announcement (again) of Goldibollocks standing for London Mayor. Cue a begging letter this time for firty faaaasand million (defeated again on the office sweepstake). They are more interested with the media attention and the fact they can send out racist literature than they are over getting out and campaigning. They also, and I’m no lawyer like Dutchy, appear to have libelled the Labour candidate already. Now I’m not one for swearing but if these odious little fuckers get more than a few thousand votes then I will give up my Anti life, sell the pub and bugger off to an Island where I can’t be reached because we will have lost the battle.

It’s still so laughable though as Goldibollocks seems to think he can tie up career politicians in knots in a debate and work on a budget of Millions whereas the biffers can’t even create their own accounts. Let me repeat and I will do until I’m red in the face (or sober) this is a gimmick, a stunt to make money for the puppets and their master. They are not interested in the votes, they are there to line their pockets, create division and then cry foul on media bias and damn Muslim appeasers.

So I’ve calmed down, the gag is off, the quick check on the EBF towers shows CBS and EBFBlogger have calmed things down, Hulk is having a monster sulk (something about trolls I think), Tankgirl is sitting in the corner quietly and the others will finally get some work done. Have a good week I have a particularly lovely barrel of Champion Gold to polish off.

Paulie does Python

Absolute power corrupts absolutely

But for Fuhrer Paul control of a mere 139 cacophonous cockwombles comes close.

The Biffers in Burton left the rest of us in no doubt that their movement is failing. From the heady days of Rotherham and Luton (where their numbers actually seemed to top 200) to their ‘massive’ Midlands mooch it’s clear that their ‘on street’ support is shrinking fast.

None of this seems to have deterred Fuhrer Paul from claiming victory (again). According to the Biffers Facebook page there were hundreds of ‘Patriots’ and just a handful of ‘leftie scum’ opposing them. The truth was actually very different with only 139 fascists facing far more opposers than they could count. The route they took, as we all know by now was lined with heckling onlookers eager to impress upon Fuhrer Paulie and his successor in waiting, Dutchy Fransen the error of their ways. ‘Fuhrer Fransen’ has a much better ring to it, don’t you think?

Yet Golding continues to claim popular authority and, in the style of Wolfie Smith or even Monty Python’s mud picking ‘Dennis’ insists that he has a valid mandate from the masses.

You can almost hear his outraged cries of

“Help, help I’m being oppressed” between the snarls and shrieks of the obedient Biffers trolling along behind their Master.

The expression on Paulie’s frightened face told a more honest tale during the shambolic shuffle along Burton High Street earlier this month.

With such a tiny following you might expect Britain First’s beloved leader to be a bit bashful but not our Paulie. The handful of fascists who take the tin pot Fuhrer seriously are enough to fuel his megalomania to almost astronomical proportions. Announcing his candidacy for London’s Mayoral election he certainly put his cards on the table. This is the guy who probably won’t even manage enough nominations to stand in the first place and yet who genuinely seems to think he’s in with a chance.

Fuhrer Golding is so confident of his impending victory and so ignorant of the limits of Mayoral authority that he actually proposes bringing back hanging (for liberals, trade unionists and all other ‘leftard’ traitors) as if that would ever be in his power, even if, by some barely imaginable miracle he actually managed to become mayor.

This is the bloodthirsty Biffer whose corrupt ambitions lead him to believe he’ll be able to engage in forced repatriation of non-white Britons – even those who were born here. This is the career Nazi who wants to extinguish all foreign aid and plunge the UK into some sort of splendid isolation that this country hasn’t experienced since before recorded European history even began.

And all of this wild buffoonery seems perfectly reasonable to megalomaniac Golding.

If this ridiculous egocentricity is the result of duping a mere 139 followers can you imagine what would happen if he ever reached the dizzy heights of 500 or even 1000?

Fuhrer Golding doesn’t need absolute power to reach the limits of absolute corruption. Another couple of dozen would probably do the trick!

Interpreting Britain First’s neo-nazi policies

Last month we critiqued Britain First’s policies. We showed how the Biffers’ Deputy Leader, Jayda “Dutchy” Fransen drew her inspiration from Nazi propagandist Julius Streicher. We went further and compared all the Biffers’ policies to their wartime German counterparts. We highlighted their remarkable similarity to the policies of Nazi Germany. We looked behind the polite, politically correct words (how ironic) and made a few predictions about what they really meant.

Last weekend the Biffers gave us the greatest gift they ever could. No more will we need to speculate about their Nazism. They’ve finally come clean and proven our original point for all the world to see. Fuhrer Golding’s hilarious announcement that he intends to run for election as London’s Mayor is nothing short of a complete admission of neo-nazi Biffer cockwomblery. They’re pretending no more. Britain First is now an OPENLY Nazi organisation.

Some of the Facebook comments accompanying the latest Biffer announcement are pure gold…

But don’t just take our word for it – see for yourself.

For our part we’ve taken a few policy screengrabs to highlight just what this announcement demonstrates about the Biffers’ previously publicized policies…

BRITAIN FIRST POLICIES

Below is the full list of present Britain First policies.

Our policies are decided at the annual Conference held each Autumn.

IMMIGRATION

– Deport all illegal immigrants;

– Deport all foreign criminals;

– Offer generous grants to those of foreign descent resident here who wish to leave permanently;

– Completely halt any further immigration except in special cases such as genuine marriages where strict citizenship criteria has been met;

– Reject and deport all “asylum seekers” who do not originate from countries bordering Britain.

GOVERNMENT

– Abolish the hated “Human Rights Act” which is being widely abused and which was forced on the UK by the EU;

– Implement an American style “Bill of Rights” guaranteeing freedom of speech, assembly and expression. No exceptions;

– Give England its own national parliament to create parity of esteem within the UK;

– Withdraw from the European Union and create a new trade agreement;

– Implement the need for referendums on any issues that involve the transfer of national sovereignty and the opening of our borders.

CRIME

– Implement a radical reversal of the legal and policing focus on the “rights” of criminals and its replacement with the traditional focus on putting the victims of crime first;

– Greater use of National Service for habitual offenders;

– The restoration of Capital Punishment for paedophiles, terrorists and murderers;

– Make prisons a place of hard labour rather than cosy holiday camps;

– Introduce the use of “chain gangs” to provide labour for national public works;

– Free the police from politically correct restrictions and unnecessary bureaucracy;

The full ‘announcement’ diatribe contains much more than these highlights (including the hilarious promise to defeat serious politicians in televised debate). You can download the whole sorry statement as a PDF here.

How anyone can think of Britain First’s Biffers as anything other than neonazi wannabes really is beyond us.

Panto Paul plays politics (PMSL)

Head Biffer, Paul “Folding” Golding has just accepted a role in this season’s pantomime season. He’s to play Dick Whittington who, of course wants to be Mayor of London.

When I heard that I laughed so much the tears ran down my legs!

You can read the whole sorry announcement here:

Britain First begs for funds for the 2016 Mayoral election, complete with the usual neo-nazi ranting we’ve come to expect from Britain First. We’ve stuck it into a PDF for you (together with a few EBF memes to provide a bit of background). The memes provide a little relief from the blatant cockwomblery of Jayda “Dutchy” Fransen’s tiresome begging letter.

And begging, of course is what it’s really all about. There’s no way that the city that was so damaged by Nazis during the Blitz, the city that led the fight against the fascists in the 1940s will surrender to their modern counterparts in 2016. But there are plenty of stupid cockwombles who’ll believe that it might.

Once again Folding Golding and Dutchy Fransen are holding out the Biffer begging bowl and once again the terminally stupid will answer the call. Many of them don’t even realise that the politics they support are just Hitler’s Nazi policies rehashed for the modern world. Let’s look at a few highlights…

“We will not rest until every traitor is punished for their crimes against our country.

And by punished, I mean good old fashioned British justice at the end of a rope!”

Fransen starts as she means to go on – threatening to murder the opposition. That’s not Nazism at all, is it? We thought democracy was all about different views freely expressed. Not according to Britain First, it seems.

“Britain First is more than a normal, political party – we are a “Declaration of War” against the establishment, the vested interests behind the scenes, the crooked, corrupt politicians and the media brainwashers.

They will all endure a “Day of Reckoning” for their crimes and treachery and we will deal with them in the same way our ancestors dealt with them: through Traitors Gate at the Tower of London!”

“We fear no enemy, not Islam, not the politicians, the Left, the media liars, let them launch their assaults on us, we are ready and poised for battle.”

The hit list of ‘traitors’ just keeps on growing…

“Our campaign will be strong, hard-line and overwhelmingly pro-British, and we don’t give a damn what nasty names they call us and how many times they try and paint us in a bad light.

We will take on the Islamists, traitors and careerists in London and make their lives hell, because that’s what they deserve.”

“This campaign is London’s “last stand” – it withstood the blitz, the plague and zepplins (sic), but it has been murdered by immigration.”

The entire begging letter has two main themes (neither of which have anything to do with real politics). The two topics are racist hatred (and a very lengthy list of people who Britain First would like to hang by the neck) and an awful lot of begging. Essentially it boils down to…

“Send us money so that we can kill the people we don’t like.”

But there is humour in there too..

“Can you imagine it in your mind’s eye: Britain First leader Paul Golding giving the likes of Sadiq Khan, Jeremy Corbyn, David Cameron, Boris Johnson, George Galloway a severe dressing down in front of the TV cameras!”

Actually, yes – we certainly can. It’d be hilarious to witness the semi-coherent Golding with his utterly inadequate grasp of history, common sense and the prevailing political landscape going up against serious politicians. They’d wipe the floor with the nasty little cockwomble. We’d all love to see that. Not that we’d ever pay Britain First for the privilege of watching his humiliation.

It’s been a while since a white supremacist was taken apart on British political TV. The last time it happened Nick Griffin (Golding’s old mentor) entertained us all with his spectacular demise on Question Time. With attitudes like these…

“Thanks to mass immigration, multiculturalism and “White Flight” we won’t be able to stand in London next time as it will be an “occupied city”.”

Folding Golding’s destruction on national TV promises to be just as entertaining!

So what will it cost our great, multicultural nation to witness Golding’s political demise?

“All of this is possible, but only if we can raise the £30,000 we need to launch our campaign on the streets of London and online.”

Yes – that’s right. Thirty grand! Judging by the amount of ‘boots on the ground’ that the Biffers usually manage to muster that’ll be around £300 each.  Good luck with that Jayda!

If you want a good laugh have a look at the PDF we’ve prepared. We’ve changed nothing (except occasionally correcting the punctuation for clarity). All we did is add a few EBF memes for context.