Fransen & Trump: A most undiplomatic incident by Landlord

Trump Fransen tweets shame.pngI was going to write my annual piss take with some Landlord friends of mine along the lines of I’m a racist cockwomble get me out of here. Instead with the diplomatic incident caused by Screechy and cohorts I thought I’d talk about that instead.

The media whores that are biffer high command think they have done it and have thrust themselves into the limelight. Questions in the House, multiple press interviews and a spokeswoman saying butt out. The reason, well, the Orange shitgibbon that calls himself president retweeted three of Screechy’s videos and now high command are wanking over the thought of all this publicity.

But far from leaving the team here at EBF banging our collective heads against the desk and giving up, as the dust settles and Screechy putting Biffer heads above the parapet it seems to have backfired spectacularly.

Biffer HQ have said they have been inundated with new members, probably from the US to rip off however a few extra Facebook likes and twitter follows are more likely the truth.

Fransen on the telly

The media reports have been to a letter uncomplimentary even Brietfart and the Heil being disparaging, those interviews I’ve seen show Screechy running out when questioned closely, the trigger question…”have you actually spoken to the Orange Shitgibbon?” They proclaimed victory over the odious and right wing LBC radio host Nick Ferrari when all I could hear was that she couldn’t answer any question he asked. They’ve even call Nigel Fartage a lefty now showing how far right they think they are. So the press ain’t helping them.

The questions in the House of Commons showed how much our elected officials think of the biffers. Although they had to be careful what they said so as not to prejudice future court cases.

Then along comes the sting in the tail, Screechy put their head above the parapet again and the press were ready. We’ve known about certain allegations for some time now, choosing not to say anything until they were substantiated. Goldibollocks is under investigation not for the size of his appendage but for a sexual assault. We understand that the investigation is ongoing but he, this paragon of Christian virtues, someone who confronts alleged wrongdoers (not bravely but with his shittroopers in tow) is now under investigation for the very thing he supposedly hates.

The press have also confirmed they are a group and no longer a “legitimate” political party. They failed to pay the £25 registration fee in time (must have spent it all on their jaunt round Europe). So now on their days of handing out the disgusting racist pamphlets on the streets one assumes they will be seeking council permission to do so.

The press have now intimated more forcefully than we could, the closeness between the biffers and the killer of Jo Cox and they’ve also shown two of the three videos retweeted by the cuntspangle in the White House to be bollocks.

So as the High Command prepare for their phone box racism (or conference as they like to call it) the biffers are starting to implode thanks to the white supremacist in charge of the western world, the two Fuehrers are on bail, Goldibollocks is being investigated for a sexual assault and the begging letters continue. There’s a hell of a lot more for us to raise our glasses to rather than bruise our heads on our desks.

Oh and Screechy, what time is your new bestie landing and getting off Air Force One to share a Vol au Vent?

Toodlepip

Advertisements

Just another crazy American

EBF Trump crazy AmericanI was out having coffee with an old friend from my hometown when the news broke. We were sitting in a swanky coffee shop making adoring noises in the general direction of our new humans (her delightful little treasure is a month or two older than mine) when our mutual admiration fest was interrupted by mobile phone alerts. My old friend was first to comment.

“OMG! Trump’s been retweeting Britain First! You’re something to do with EBF aren’t you?”

I almost fell off my chair. Not only did I not know she’d heard of EBF, I definitely didn’t know she knew I was involved.

“Yes,” I replied, taken aback.

“I’m EBF Blogger”

“I knew it!” She exclaimed. “I knew that was you. I can tell your style of writing a mile away!”

My friend and I had gone right through school together. We almost always sat next to each other and even met in each other’s houses to do homework. We really were the geeky girls of the class. So it stands to reason that if anyone would know my writing style, she would.

“So?” She inquired. “What do you make of that?”

“Just another crazy American who thinks they understand British society.” I said.

“Most of Britain First’s followers are either paid-for clickfarm likes or foreigners. The American Christian right wing has always been keen on slagging off non-Christians so BF’s anti-Muslim, anti-brown agenda appeals to them.”

My friend stared blankly back at me, clearly surprised that I didn’t see this ‘shot in the arm’ for the Biffers as a problem.

“It’s no big deal.” I said. “Britain First has lost all credibility in UK. British people took a while to see them for what they are but now everybody who cares to look knows that they’re a bunch of far-right bigots. They can get American Facebook support if they want but that won’t help them in this country. If they get a few American donors… IF that happens they’ll just squander the money on European holidays and fines for public order offences anyway.”

“So you’re not worried that the President of the free world just endorsed them?”

“The president of what? I didn’t vote in that election. He’s president of America – nowhere else. And anyway – even the Yanks want shot of him!”

My friend smiled and sat back in her overly stuffed comfy chair.

“Just another crazy American, then.” She said, wiping the second most adorable little baby face in the world.

Jayda crosses the religious divide

What has an English Catholic, the grandaughter of Anglicised Dutch and Irish Catholic immigrants and a proud ‘Essex girl’ to do with Ulster Unionists?

Jayda Fransen Britain First leader NI Northern Ireland.pngTo be honest, we’ve no idea but Jayda Fransen clearly thinks she’s the very woman to lead Northern Ireland’s protestant contingent to victory over… well… other Irish people apparently.

This weekend the heroine of the Battle of Hexthorpe, this Roman Catholic of Jewish ancestry who ran so bravely from the children of a small South Yorkshire mining village seems set to take on the Irish Catholics of her own ancestry in all their paramilitary splendour. You really couldn’t make it up… and so we didn’t.

Amid the barely audible cheers of a couple of dozen Belfast bigots, watched by bemused (and armed) police from the Royal Ulster Constabulary, Fransen declared herself the unelected leader of Ireland’s Unionists.

This really could end in tears.

Biffers, Islamists, God and me

I’m not really very religious but I thought perhaps I should have a little word in God’s shell-like. Too much stuff didn’t make any sense. So I sat down in a quiet room with curtains drawn and meditative candles duly lit, all set to talk to my maker.

It wasn’t a long conversation but it seemed to straighten a few things out for me. It went like this…

dear-god-biffers-isis-never-knew-me

Britain First: Still inciting civil war

Yes we know, they’re trying to look ‘all respectable’, standing in the London Assembly elections and all that. But underneath that (extremely thin) veneer of reasonableness they’re still the same old thugs trying to start a civil war just llike they always did?

Don’t believe us? Have a look at this.

EBF BF Wake up and rise up.png

Britain First have been posting this sort of incitement on their Facebook platform for years now. They really can’t pretend that they don’t anticipate these sorts of responses any longer. It’s always the same – only now some of their followers are starting to put their words into practice. That’s just exactly what Britain First wants, of course.

We’ve outlined the reasoning behind their attempts to fuel division, hatred and civil violence several times. You can read blog posts explaining why it’s so profitable for them here, here and here (that last one is all about how they exploit Christianity for profit just as they exploit everything else). Alternatively, download our free PDF examining the bloodthristy tactics of the Britain First business model in rather more detail.

Britain First’s Admin, Anthony Blunn’s vlog part 2

Last Thursday we posted a highly entertaining vlog produced by Biffer Facebook administrator and ‘11th in command’ security guy, Anthony Blunn. At that time we promised to dissect his brief monologue in detail (once we’d stopped laughing). That took a while!

BF Anthony Blunn no go areas vlog

Anyway – we’ve managed to calm down, wiped the tears from our cheeks (and from Kit’s legs) and taken an altogether more serious look at the rubbish that the fine upstanding ‘Great British Patriot’ has produced. Fortunately for us the video doesn’t last very long so we were able to critique it in just a couple of sittings.

The overall topic is ‘no go areas’, something that ‘lefties’ and ‘radio DJs’ are apparently unable to comprehend. Blunn focuses on East London which he likens, rather inexplicably to Afghanistan. He claims that it’s easy enough to get into East London but you’ll have great difficulty getting out again. In truth Blunn has recent experience of this having accompained his Fuhrer, Paul Golding on several recent excursions to the East London Mosque. Here he has enjoyed himself blocking the entrance, intimidating worshippers and generally making a complete cockwomble of himself. The Blunster seems never to have had any difficulty getting out of East London, indeed making it all the way back to Wolverhampton at least 7 times so far. The last retreat from the area was so easy the Biffers managed it in record time!

BF Burton Golding run away monty python Arthur Holy Grail

The truth is that anyone can go to East London and anyone can leave. There are no gangs of maurading Jihadists lying in wait to kidnap white women or behead far-right ‘patriots’. There are just people going about their business. Some of whom live in the area and some of whom commute in and out daily. Blunn seems to think that you can’t be safe in East London unless you wave a ‘flag of truce’ (whatever that might look like) and hoist it ‘high and clear’ to let the local British citizens know that you, as a fellow British citizen, come in peace, to buy Halal food or perhaps to convert to Islam.

What Blunn should have said is… “Don’t be a dick”.

BF run away from East London Mosque

If you turn up with placards and banners, intimidate the locals and generally make a complete cock of yourself, of course you won’t be welcome. And if you repeat the same outlandish behaviour SEVEN TIMES, eventually you’ll be chased away. Fair enough.

Don’t be a Dick!

Unfortunately The Great British Patriot doesn’t seem to understand this simple point. He sees a conspiracy where everyone else sees simple ‘cause and effect’. Blunn thinks the answer is to get Christians living in the area (the area they’re not supposed to be able to go into, by the way) to start defaming Mohammed and having a go at Imams. Apparently that way the mosques will soon be empty, Islam will disappear from the UK and all the Christian churches will be full. It’s remarkable how the far-right seem to think every issue, however complex can be solved with a simple ‘black or white’ equation. Numpties!

Funniest of all ‘the Blunster’ references two videos, one of which he credits but it seems he knows his subject so well he can’t remember who produced the other. We had a look. We wished we hadn’t!

All we can say (without producing another catalogue of posts entirely) is that they contain the predictable, far-right misrepresentation, hyperbole and downright deceit we’ve learned to expect from the Biffers and their ideological kind.

As vlogs go it’s still really funny though.

Cockwomble!

View from a barstool in the cellar

Beer 2The landlady and the kids are with the in-laws and I’m left here drinking the profits and suffering from a dose of fash fatigue. Being an admin on Exposing Britain First and the constant cases of islamophobic bullshit from the Fuhrer bunker does get us down. The bombs in Belgium are hard to stomach with wall to wall media coverage, security experts telling us what is happening even though it’s just conjecture and the arses in Bifferland lapping it up and providing the propaganda they need to play on the fears of already scared people. The right wing newspapers and our wonderful TV news stations helping them with their recruitment.

But where was the right wing and media angst as bombs were set off in Iraq, in Turkey and other places in Africa and the world. Did you even hear of these as I certainly didn’t, I didn’t see an outpouring of grief on Facebook, didn’t see people changing their profiles to a Turkish flag or an Iraqi one or any other to be honest. The right have even gone as far as to put the disgusting murders in Belgium as a reason for Brexit. Just like the Muslims we have had to put out the same old tired statement of us abhorring the bombings and saying that Daesh are a bunch of murderous bastards whom we are against. My brother works and lives in Brussels, and his workplace is near enough opposite to the station that was bombed. The overwhelming mantra coming from his fellow staff, from many different European nations, is that this was not a Muslim attack but a Daesh one.

BF Pieman Steve Lewis arrestedWith that out of the way (but not forgotten) back to the Fuhrer and his high command. Steve Lewis arrested and bailed for wearing a political uniform had us in stitches. Poor old Pieman, losing a banner last year, being moved down the pecking order in the shittrooper numbers, having to do the seemingly dodgy accounts on a 60’s typewriter and leader of the South East Brigade and now nicked. Steve is one of the more articulate Biffers but even he has slowly been indoctrinated into Bifferdom and writes more and more religious claptrap. We know he reads the page so Steve, hope you enjoyed the 16 hours in the cells. We hope you will be trusted enough to hold the banners again.

What else? Oh yeah, the mayoral election, begging letters, and some religious memes for the sheeple to eat up.

Goldibollocks is on the march going round trying to find 10 idiots in each borough of London to back him, even tweeting because Enfield Council had the audacity of making him hold on the phone, assumingly to get hold of the voters roll. Three of my friends who live in the London Mayoral area have asked that the Biffers do not get their names and addresses as they do not wish to have racist literature through their doors and also they feel that the Fuhrer bunker will use this for more sinister means. I’ll give an update shortly on how they got on.

So it appears that Goldibollocks and Screechy made their target to stand in the elections. They still accuse the Labour candidate of being an extremist Muslim and that London is no longer British. The great thing about this is that London is such a diverse, multi-cultural, thriving capital that will consign them to where my mates will put their propaganda, in the bin.

BF Sadiq Khan.png

If you read the Biffer page, I realise that this is hard for you, you will have seen the furore and foam-fest of the sheeple over the apparent removal of the word ‘Easter’ on Cadbury’s Easter oval things. Apparently this was to appease Muslims who quite frankly couldn’t give a toss about it. They have more important things to worry about (islamaphobia, being chucked off planes, securing mosques from right wing fucknuggets). The Daily Star had a front page spread about it and the Biffers were not amused. However a quick phonecall to Cadbury’s and a totally harassed customer services lady told me that this was the biggest load of crap she had ever seen. They may have taken off the word Easter from the front of the packaging but the word appears 4 times in various places.

Easter eggs Cadbury 2016.png

Coming so soon after the hot cross buns and Kingsmill saga’s it seems that once again Bifferland is foaming over a headline and not the story.

So that’s the week in a nutshell, just an ordinary week in the world of EBF, from bombs to Easter eggs, you couldn’t make it up… Could you?

Cheers