More false advertising by the Biffers

We had a quick butcher’s at the Biffer Facebook page the other day. That’s their preferred environment for ‘…doin’ politics, innit?’ They still haven’t worked out that false, paid for likes from foreign clickfarms (they click you long time!) aren’t the same as actual votes. But occasionally, just sometimes they crawl out from under their seedy little rock and head off into the real world. A bit like this…

As usual the turnout was tiny but that’s not the important thing. Have a look at the little bald biffer with glasses in the front row. His jacket isn’t quite the same colour as the usual Biffer ‘bottle-out’ green. There’s a reason for that.

Here we see the same sad fash wannabe from the back. His jacket isn’t ‘bottle-out’ green because it’s representing a genuine heroes’ charity. But what’s a ‘Help for Heroes’ jacket doing on a Britain First ‘Day of action’?

We’ve asked Help for heroes. We’ll let you know their reply.

Simple solutions to complex problems

Every complex problem has a simple solution – and it’s always wrong!

The current refugee crisis is the result of a complex conspiracy of circumstances involving geo-politics, financial exploitation, religious tensions, racial stereotyping and opportunist extremism. That’s exactly the sort of complicated melting-pot of variables that Britain First is least equipped to comprehend. But that doesn’t stop the Biffers from wading in with their ill-conceived suggestions.

It’s hard to imagine just how desperate you would need to be to leave everything you have and walk across hostile territory to a foreign land, risking death from exhaustion, exposure, drowning or even kidnap and slavery along the way. We at EBF freely admit that we just cannot imagine how that must feel – and we count ourselves fortunate because of it.

Such desperation is far beyond our experience. All we really know is that the decent thing, the compassionate thing (and for those of us who believe, the Christian thing) is to help our fellow humans in their hour of need.

Let’s have a look at what the ‘Christian’ Biffers want to do. How would they handle the situation?

It seems that they have a very different view of Christian charity from the rest of us. It’s small wonder that every single British church group has condemned their rhetoric and their actions in no uncertain terms.

These are not the considered, measured words of intelligent, caring leaders. These are not the attitudes of people we would want to ‘take our country back’ from its current, compassionate state. These are not the ‘elite’ defenders of British values that Dutchy would have us believe. These are callous, hypocritical, ill-informed, bloodthirsty, fascist scum.

These are the people who must never gain power in UK.

It’s easy to come up with simple solutions when you have no real responsibility for solving the problem. Just like their followers, Fuhrer Golding and Dutchy Fransen have no real world authority (Fransen managed only 56 votes in the Rochester and Strood by-election and Britain First didn’t even stand a candidate in the last General Election). They’re not even a party in opposition – they’re a party with absolutely no elected representatives at any level in UK. They don’t even have any parish councillors (the lowest level of British government)!

So they can spout whatever jingoistic rubbish they like without ever having to think about how to make it work or the damage their ridiculous policies would cause. That’s the one great advantage of powerlessness. You never have to prove what you say – you just keep on saying it and your followers, at least those stupid enough to remain your followers, will believe it and repeat it.

There’s a simple solution to every complex problem. And it’s always wrong!

EDL shows its spiteful true colours

The English Defence League, under the auspices of its new, post-Tommy leadership has decided to target Preston, that well-known hotbed of Islamic extremism for its next demonstration. Readers of this blog may well have heard of this fine, multicultural Northern town before.

Preston is the home town of those public-spirited, outstanding Muslim citizens who volunteered to put themselves out so much during December’s floods. They even drove 100 miles North to help out with evacuations, distribute food and donate money and bedding. These are the guys who raised over four thousand pounds down the local Mosque for flood victims in less than a week. These are the guys who demonstrated that renowned British spirit of helpfulness and selfless service to others. The fact that it’s also a foundational element of Islam may not be all that familiar to the drunken defenders of England but they should at least be able to recognise the generosity that they claim as their own.

On the other hand, we at EBF don’t remember reading anything at all about the selfless generosity of EDL members during those difficult times. We’d be happy to stand corrected if anyone can furnish us with newspaper articles about the EDL helping flood victims in their hour of need. Just post the links in the comments below. Go on – feel free.

And how will this noble and knightly order  of the imbibing brethren honour the service of Preston’s Muslim community?
Will they contribute to the Mosque’s next charity appeal fund?
Will they write a letter to the newspapers in praise of Islamic selflessness?
Will they post a message of appreciation on their Facebook page?

We doubt it.

What they will do is go and make a nuisance of themselves next month, terrorising Preston’s Muslims and stirring up as much trouble as they can before nipping off for a beer and a punch up.

And they think of themselves as the embodiment of all that’s British.

We think they could learn an awful lot about Britishness and even about common decency and humanity from Preston’s Muslims. We don’t expect that they will though! Bleedin’ nazis!

A view from a barstool #15

Where does the time go? Another week gone, kids ensconsed nicely at school, the landlady still unhappy at me for whatever reason (probably spending time at the EBF office, sniggering in general at the Biffers or just in general like usual), and shock at the death of some celebrities. Don’t get me wrong, the passing of celebrities is awful, especially if they shaped your life but too many things are going on in the world for me to do anything more than raise a glass to them, watch one of their films or listen to an album on the record player.

So what has happened in bifferland this week, the usual mix of lies,lies and inflaming posts. More and more religious posts, more tinfoil armour and a TV studio news report from Goldibollocks himself.

I don’t know about you but Jon Snow et al don’t have much to worry about when it comes to Goldibollocks taking their jobs. A near 10 minute rant, badly written, littered with lies, false figures and misinformation had me laughing all the way to the cash and carry. The irony is they let their sheeple know it was from the “Britain First TV studio” but a quick search by our computer experts and lo and behold it was a 15 quid app that anyone can use. Nevertheless stand by for the begging letters for TV studio time that will be lapped up pretty soon.

The MBE for one of our military heroes Captain Naveed Mohammed went totally unnoticed by the biffers who by their own admission are supporters of all our troops. I wonder why this could be. It seems you can put on the military uniform, go to war, be prepared to lay down your life for your country but please don’t be a Muslim or Bifferdom will shun you.

Sir I salute you.

Cultural Marxism and lefty politicians have come under fire as well, as the churchgoing public dwindle. This according to the biffers is a show that Islam is rising and all us lefties are somehow picketing churches on a Sunday.

I’m not a religious man, I was thrown out of the scouts for daring to question religion, but surely the reasons for this is the latest generation’s choice to play Xstation, dream of being a reality TV star or a premiership footballer. The Anglican church is also angering both conservatives and liberals with various rulings. If the biffers want British church levels to rise then surely all of them should shrug off their hangovers and go and put bums on seats, however as only 60ish% of their followers live on this Isle it won’t make much difference. EBFblogger has more reasons why and she puts her finger on the issues, these are only my musings.

Something away from Bifferland but still within their radar is the rise of Pegida in Europe and the person in charge, convicted criminal Tommy Robinson. He’s been inciting hate over in Germany and the eventual rise in tensions appear to be from Pegida’s message of hate. They are coming over here, the last two times they managed 50 or so marchers as the right wing over here is fragmented and suspicious of each others groups. The German police have caught a neo-nazi group attempting terrorist attacks against mosques and Muslims, but again no condemnation from Europe, no leaders sending messages of support to the Muslim community just a media blackout.

Finally the new marching season appears to be on the horizon, with the right wing cockwombles visiting various places in Britain under various guises, BUF, BUP, White man march, Biffers, EDL, Casuals, National Unity, This is England and on and on and on. They think they are clever trying to pull those who can’t abide these idiots from place to place but the truth is their marches will be countered and will be in numbers the right can only dream of.

Now back to the studio (thats a better link than Goldibollocks ever dreamed of), we are still gaining sponsorship money for the Industrial estate shuffle but would still like to raise more to help the victims of the floods, we are still mainly countering the biffers but cockwombles like the EDL, Trump, Pegida et al will all be scrutinised, we are all refreshed and raring to go.

I was asked if my handbag present to the Landlady worked, I have the pleasure to report it did which is why this week I have tried my best not to laugh at the Biffers attempts to get me a divorce.

Cheers

View from a barstool #14

Evening all.

So the Christmas tree is chopped up and ready for the fire, the decorations are in the loft and the kids are back at school. The festivities are over for another year and the Christmas lies from the biffers are also consigned to the loft only to be regurgitated around October.

So let’s have a rummage through all things Biffer over the last 7 days. Let’s have a little look…..

Aha obviously a nasty credit card bill just arrived as there is a begging email. Unfortunately the mystic landlady got it wrong so I lost my 50p in the office sweepstake. I can’t believe after all this time of not picking £5thaaaasand. I did this time and the little buggers go and pick £1975. Now I’m not sure whether you’ve ever had to engage a solicitor before but they’re bloody expensive and I’m not sure that 2 grand would do a lot. Just a thought Goldibollocks. If you don’t harass ladies in their homes, don’t wear political uniforms and certainly don’t act like a Cockwomble, you won’t get nicked and you won’t have to pay.

An item on their page inferred that a Muslim gang beat up a white man in Baildon this week.

The trouble is after reading the paper it appears the assailants were “predominantly white.” There was a predictable outrage over at Biffer central and some of the comments were absolutely vile and disgusting. I understand that the post was passed to West Yorkshire police, and amazingly the post disappeared.

Now I’m not into conspiracy theories, (except that Fosters continuously put mind drugs in their barrels), but trying to incite the local population might rather have lead the coppers to re route their shuffle round Dewsbury to a car park and an industrial estate. Another tip for you Goldibollocks, don’t antagonise the cops and they may just not antagonise you. In saying that continue on your shuffle because we here in the EBF group are sponsoring you. If you haven’t seen the page please sponsor us to sponsor them. Funds will go towards helping the victims of the floods (at the time of writing £259 has been pledged).

Apart from the usual “Muslims are this” and “Muslims are that”, the last thing that caught my eye this week, apart from the landlady’s new hairdo, was the fact they have ditched the conferences (probably because they’ve ran out of places that’ll have them and BT won’t let them have a phonebox) and decided to have a bifferfest instead. Now I’m not sure about you but I haven’t stopped sniggering since, causing the landlady to think I’m having an affair with the barmaid (I’m a grumpy old sod most of the time you see).

This festival in a field near somewhere is free (tenner for a wee??) where you can learn about British fascism, sorry ‘culture’, have discussions on bifferland, sports, and have food and drink there. It’s also camping so Millets might want to stock Union Flag tents (although given their tendencies to fly them upside down on their shuffles, 10 upside down tents in a field would make me titter. Also do they make bullet proof tents for the commanders in chief? I’m also assuming that it will only be non halal food there, would be such a shame if some did infiltrate its way into their diets. Anyway good luck getting your TENs license not easy when a load of publicans and licensees have words with contacts.

Finally, another page that brought great mirth to me and the others was the absolute foamfest over on the Kingsmill Facebook page over Kingsmill’s decision to become halal certified. Now as some of you are great troll hunters (a new badge has just been made) pop over there, leave a message and sit back.

Now I must go, something about a buying a handbag for the landlady as penance for being cheerful.

Cheers

Landlord

A silk purse from a pig’s ear

This is just marvellous!

Last weekend a few of the EBF team were having a chinwag in the office over a hobnob or three when they came up with a cunning plan to get the Biffers to do something actually useful for once. They’re going to make the neo-nazis at Britain First make money for someone else for a change.
As most people know the Biffers plan to inflict themselves on Deswbury at the end of this month. It’s ironic that the group that claims to care so much about British people, the group that did nothing at all to help British flood victims is visiting Yorkshire, one of the worst hit regions in the country.

Keeping in mind the idea that it’s never too late to help, the EBF team has found a way to make the Biffer shuffle through Dewsbury worthwhile – but not for the reasons the Biffers want.

Instead of being a platform for narrow-minded, bigoted neo-nazis to fill their own coffers, the Biffers’ drunken stagger through Dewsbury will become a fund-raising platform for flood relief. They’ll hate that! The Biffers hate giving money to anyone but themselves!

EBF has set up its very own Go Fund Me account where people can donate to flood relief directly without letting the Biffers get their grubby little hands anywhere near the money. It’s easy to do – just click the link and enter your details into the secure payment form. You can donate anonymously too if you’re worried about reprisals from the terminally tight-fisted Biffers.

You’ll get to help people in need AND piss off the Biffers, especially if we raise more money for Flood relief than Britain First raises for themselves. Now that really is making a charitable silk purse out of a Fascist pig’s ear!

View from a barstool #12

This weeks barstool is from an old friends pub in the Home Counties as I try simultaneously to kick one hangover to begin another.

Whilst some of us were drinking to excess, filling our stomachs with rich fancy food and opening presents the rain came down in the Northern Shires bringing more floods and despair to thousands. The army and emergency services working round the clock to help,and pictures of wonderful people helping those who are in distress. If like me you’re waiting for those pictures on the Biffer pages you won’t, whilst they were eating and drinking, it was Muslims that showed us the true meaning of Christmas.

If like me you’ve lived all your life away from a flood area and think that big puddle you have to drive through is big, spare a thought for those in Yorkshire, Cumbria and those other affected areas.

I see the Biffer Christmas message went up again, Goldibollocks obviously was too drunk or not trusted enough with the bigoted load of drivel that was produced. I managed 2 minutes of this rubbish before I was brain dead but fortunately Kit and Prole endured it so if you missed it here is my take on it. Blah blah blah Christians, blah blah blah BBC not Christian, blah blah blah Islam taking over,blah blah blah rubbish zzzzzzzz.

Apparently the same old tired regurgitated crap came out again and again. Watch out patriots get jiggy with it or Islam will take over by 2050, the BBC only showing 8 hours of Christian programs, I thought it was a public broadcaster that had to cater for everyone. Our exalted prime minister not mentioning Christianity, although when I saw his message that is all it was.

As we hurtle towards a New Year I’m sitting here once again, pint in hand, wondering about what next year holds for us here at EBF. I’m wondering if the biffers will pack up and leave, the words “goodwill to all men” will be backed up by deeds, that we can fight extremism and beat it in whatever form it comes, that the bombing in Syria stops and another way to beat Daesh is found, that Israel stops the genocide of the Palestinians and the killing stops and that the world can live in harmony. But then I had a slug of ale and realised that although these are laudable ideals there is no way these will come about. Biffers will continue to hate, con and lie.

Extremism will continue almost unabated, bombing will continue because minerals and armament companies need it to, and Israel and Palestine will continue to fight. And EBF will continue too. We will continue to counter lies, continue to laugh at bifferdom, continue to highlight the good in anyone regardless of religion or creed.

So as I order my second pint of the day may I wish all your aspirations come true next year and all followers of the page and your families and friends a happy and peaceful new year.

Cheers

Alam Sher: An inspiration to us all

Alam Sher isn’t looking for recognition or to win any popularity contests. But that’s what he deserves. He’s a perfect example of what happens when good people decide that ‘enough is enough’, see the poverty and the distress that exists in their local community and decide to do something about it.

It was 2012 when Alam, then aged 59 took it upon himself to cook for hungry Glaswegians and distribute food free of charge to those who had nothing. Now, nearly three years later the food is still prepared in Alam’s own home, just as before but the whole operation has grown significantly since those early days.

Now Alam’s venture has grown far beyond its humble beginnings. Local businesses regularly donate food and the poverty relief project has two fully staffed soup kitchens, one at the Glasgow Central Mosque and another on the city’s Cadogan Street, and a fleet of drivers who distribute around 100 food packs every week to homeless and poverty-stricken people throughout the city.

Apart from the 100 food packs already mentioned, Alam and his team also provide an additional 30 food packs per week to refugees and asylum seekers through the charity ‘Positive Action’. The team estimates that they’ve delivered around 20,000 food parcels free of charge since the first hot food found its way out of Alam’s kitchen and on to the plates of Glasgow’s most desperate citizens back in 2012.

From their base at the Glasgow Central Mosque the poverty relief project has also developed working links with the Glasgow Homeless Shelter and runs a successful sideline in collecting and distributing clothing, a much-needed service given the cold winter weather of Clydeside’s most famous city.

You can learn more about the poverty relief project, along with the other services from community bridge-building through ‘Islam awareness’ to the blood donation programme run by the Glasgow Central Mosque here.

Don’t suffer – go to Suffa instead

We have heard so much that is negative about Islam and about individual Muslims from Britain First’s propaganda machine that it’s easy to forget the real people behind the slander. Muslims, just like the members of every other human group vary. Some are nice and some are nasty. Some are criminal and some abide by the law. Some are extremists (like their Biffer counterparts) and some are exceptional in their kindness and in their humanity.

We recently learned about the Suffa project, a Muslim led organisation intended to help homeless people (‘Suffa’ is the Arabic word for ‘Shelter’). The inspiration for the project comes from the Islamic instruction to provide food for the hungry and shelter for the destitute.

In Suffa’s own words…

“Our intention is to seek the pleasure of Allah by acting upon the numerous teachings of the Qur’aan and sayings of His Messenger (sallAllahu alaihi wa sallam) that exhort the feeding of the poor and welfare of the destitute.”

The idea began in Birmingham during the month of Ramadan, the period of fasting in which Muslims are called upon to fast during daylight hours and use the money saved to help others. A group of Muslims began simply by walking around the W. Midlands city providing cups of tea, biscuits and some non-judgemental interaction to the rough-sleepers they encountered. That was in 2011. Since then Suffa has developed into a year-round project and it’s spreading to other British towns as well.

With bases in Birmingham, Walsall, Sheffield, Leicester, Coventry and Bolton the organisation provides thousands of meals to hungry, homeless people and it has plans to develop even further, eventually aiming to provide both financial assistance and training to help people get back on their feet again.

You can learn more about the Suffa project here.

Contact Suffa via their Birmingham branch here.