View from a barstool #53 by Landlord

Well well well…..Facebook have finally seen sense and banned the biffers page from their social media platform, following twitter.

FB ban BF poll

But hold on a mo, the admins here at EBF are already debating whether to buy expensive champagne or a fiver special from Aldi. Are we out of work, or is this just the beginning of the beginning of the end.

As Screechy and Goldibollocks languish in their Victorian cells (their words not mine) the rudderless fascist ship races towards oblivion. The days of Lewis, Lomax, Carmelo, Besser and Slattery a now distant past and Councillor Bigot and the new gormless ones led by chief mousketeer Andy Edge, (who soon could also be serving time in a rotting jail) trying desperately to keep their magic money tree up. It appears Facebook are dealing a coup de grace to this vile, hate-filled bigoted group as it appears their only money grabbing platform is Facebook.

A new page is already up, Facebook have said they will remove but before they do it appears we can all comment on it. Three years of pent up hate from me will be unleashed when the kids go to bed.

ebf fb ban bf

But is it really over? Are we finally seeing the death throes of Britain First? Are we, the admins finally going to get back to concentrating on work, families and having a proper social life? Are we able now to become husbands, wives, mothers and fathers? Well… No. Screechy and Goldibollocks are still about, 36 and 18 weeks ain’t a lot of time. We were hoping years banged up but they aren’t.

So EBF continues until they’ve gone, either fucking off to Fascist enclaves in the Europe they hate or jailed for such a long time they become irrelevant. We’ll still, with your help, chase them, laugh at them and expose them until they decide they’ve conned enough money to fuck off for good.

But for now the ice machine is open the cheap Cava is opened and a celebratory sip is in order. The final push is on!

Cheers

Toodlepip

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View from a barstool by Landlord

Beer 2Wow, what a lot to think about in the last month and a half. Defections, court cases, the Northern Irish branch of bigotry, court cases, sex assault allegations, court cases all wrapped up in a huge dose of begging communication from Biffer towers. Also a huge amount of blind eye turning, fake tears oh and just a sprinkling of running away.

Where to begin? Well I suppose we’ll deal with the Belfast court case, a visit to town hall and a huge amount of laughing over here as Councillor Bigot tries to wiggle free of an investigation by city hall. So Screechy travelled over to Belfast to answer charges of “using threatening, abusive or insulting words or behaviour” at the huge peace rally of 30 potatoes. Goldibollocks turned up with a huge entourage, well 5 tits, some of whom have questionable pasts, who haven’t heard of slimming world to back up the newly self appointed potato Queen. He was promptly arrested along with Banksy and Rimmer (no this isn’t an episode of Red Dwarf) on hate charges. Although the trial will be at a later date not all was lost for our intrepid racists as Councillor Bigot showed the Queen around and let her try on the robes. Queen potato Screechy liked the look of the Mayoral throne so much that she decided it was hers and perched her Englishish (Dutch) arse on there leading to outrage. Councillor Bigot is to be investigated and she wailed to her Facebook cronies in indecipherable babble that she hadn’t done anything wrong (well that’s what my Bigot auto-translate said so things are going well there then.

EBF BF Jayda Belfast mayoral robes council chamber

The sex assault allegations against Goldibollocks are still under investigation so I won’t comment much on them. I just wonder, given Screechy’s testimony recently whether the latest begging bowl email is for leaflets attacking ‘The Rochdale One’!!!!

Fast forward to this last week and the trial of another deranged potato Darren Osbourne and the intimation that Screechy, Goldibollocks and Tommeh had either been in contact with him or their writings and videos had radicalised him into running over a Muslim at Finsbury Park Mosque. Even if it is only a little bit true will we now see widespread condemnation of right wing hate preachers. Tommeh, Hopkins, Screechy and Goldibollocks are just as guilty in my mind as the disgusting Hamza and Choudhary. Every time I see them spout on about Muslims being radicalised in their mosques I will make it a mission (at least until I am banned or blocked) to mention Mair and Osbourne.

darren osborne tommy mair

The resignation of Steve Lewis is another amazing event in the last 60 days. Steve is the banner losing rather rotund chap who has been a member of the inner circle for as long as I can remember. A member of Security, writer of the accounts and privy to a lot of happenings. His rather public resignation (now taken down for whatever reasons) stated that he couldn’t live with the scam artists and pisstaking that the high command are now taking. Andrew Edge and others who have basically taken over whilst genuine potatoes like Steve are pushed out. Some have said that Steve was the acceptable face of the Biffers but a cunt is a cunt and he is definitely one. However it is fun to watch as former trusted members of the Fuehrer bunker resign so publicly.

With Steve gone, and therefore light on security a couple of chaps spotted brave Sir Goldibollocks in Curry’s (what a name of a shop to be in) and as he came out confronted him. Goldibollocks bravely fled back into the shop shitting himself and hid. I guess when confronting Muslims the biffer rules are

1) make sure there are BFD about and
2) make sure said Muslims are over the age of 70.

BF EBF Jayda Fransen Fuhrer in waitingThe defection of Stevie came as a forerunner to the trial in Folkestone around Biffer videos of the Ramsgate 555 kebab shop rapists. Now most of us were probably sad enough to keep refreshing the Kent Live update pages and so if you did you probably read wide eyed about what happened and the blatant lies from our cowardly biffers. Whether or not they caused a stillborn baby, the way it looked to me that the ferocity of the harassment is enough to send them down. The bit that had me laughing more than anything was when Goldibollocks said he knew nothing of what was going to happen. Well Goldibollocks that, I’m afraid is another load of smelly steaming bullshit. As leader of your potato movement if you didn’t know maybe you are leader in name only and should step aside and let Queen Screechy take over as moley has intimated on numerous occasions that she wants to do.BF Belfast bigot Bunting

60 days in which the biffers have collected £40k and are now asking for life members at a knock down price (you do get a signed pic of Screechy and Goldibollocks) to sign and donate a potato pledge, a monthly direct debit to cover their drinks, parties, drugs and holidays. To grease the palm of Councillor Bigot, to keep the thug Edge onside.

So there you have it 60 days 2 court cases, a reprimand, a defection, a con or two and a surrender. I haven’t even mentioned Trump and his put down or my favourite photo of the 60 days….Goldibollocks sitting waiting to go into court in Belfast , just round the corner from a huge stainglassed window with the words No Pasaran.

Toodlepip

Fransen & Trump: A most undiplomatic incident by Landlord

Trump Fransen tweets shame.pngI was going to write my annual piss take with some Landlord friends of mine along the lines of I’m a racist cockwomble get me out of here. Instead with the diplomatic incident caused by Screechy and cohorts I thought I’d talk about that instead.

The media whores that are biffer high command think they have done it and have thrust themselves into the limelight. Questions in the House, multiple press interviews and a spokeswoman saying butt out. The reason, well, the Orange shitgibbon that calls himself president retweeted three of Screechy’s videos and now high command are wanking over the thought of all this publicity.

But far from leaving the team here at EBF banging our collective heads against the desk and giving up, as the dust settles and Screechy putting Biffer heads above the parapet it seems to have backfired spectacularly.

Biffer HQ have said they have been inundated with new members, probably from the US to rip off however a few extra Facebook likes and twitter follows are more likely the truth.

Fransen on the telly

The media reports have been to a letter uncomplimentary even Brietfart and the Heil being disparaging, those interviews I’ve seen show Screechy running out when questioned closely, the trigger question…”have you actually spoken to the Orange Shitgibbon?” They proclaimed victory over the odious and right wing LBC radio host Nick Ferrari when all I could hear was that she couldn’t answer any question he asked. They’ve even call Nigel Fartage a lefty now showing how far right they think they are. So the press ain’t helping them.

The questions in the House of Commons showed how much our elected officials think of the biffers. Although they had to be careful what they said so as not to prejudice future court cases.

Then along comes the sting in the tail, Screechy put their head above the parapet again and the press were ready. We’ve known about certain allegations for some time now, choosing not to say anything until they were substantiated. Goldibollocks is under investigation not for the size of his appendage but for a sexual assault. We understand that the investigation is ongoing but he, this paragon of Christian virtues, someone who confronts alleged wrongdoers (not bravely but with his shittroopers in tow) is now under investigation for the very thing he supposedly hates.

The press have also confirmed they are a group and no longer a “legitimate” political party. They failed to pay the £25 registration fee in time (must have spent it all on their jaunt round Europe). So now on their days of handing out the disgusting racist pamphlets on the streets one assumes they will be seeking council permission to do so.

The press have now intimated more forcefully than we could, the closeness between the biffers and the killer of Jo Cox and they’ve also shown two of the three videos retweeted by the cuntspangle in the White House to be bollocks.

So as the High Command prepare for their phone box racism (or conference as they like to call it) the biffers are starting to implode thanks to the white supremacist in charge of the western world, the two Fuehrers are on bail, Goldibollocks is being investigated for a sexual assault and the begging letters continue. There’s a hell of a lot more for us to raise our glasses to rather than bruise our heads on our desks.

Oh and Screechy, what time is your new bestie landing and getting off Air Force One to share a Vol au Vent?

Toodlepip

A heartfelt apology by Landlord

EBF Fransen arrested.jpgI/we have an apology to make, in the two and a half years since I became an admin on Exposing Britain First I’ve never made an appeal but this week I’ve looked in petty cash, behind the sofa and all I found was 22p a half packet of hobnobs, a small jar of coffee, 33 mint imperials and a half packet of wine gums. The reason for looking……our irony machine and biffer outrage machines are fucked, they packed up and left the office sometime on Thursday and haven’t been seen since.

We urgently need twelvty million pounds or Ant, Foxy, Nemesis and Prole will be gently rocking in their office chairs and I and the others will bugger off down the pub to drink what is left of our funds.

Poppy outrage is over, mirth over as Goldibollocks tried to show reverence as he laid a wreath, at 4 o’clock and everyone else was tucking into their Sunday lunch or watching the Grand Prix. Reports that he was told he was not welcome at the actual parade are as yet unconfirmed.

Screechy meanwhile the upholder of all things British and on this most patriotic of days, conned the police so she didn’t have to sign on in Bromley and went, not to a Remembrance service, but to address a bunch of Polish Nazis. Biffer propaganda tried to spin it that she was talking to the 30000 Poles at their Independence Day rally when in actual fact she was speaking to a fringe of goose stepping Polish Fascists. Next time she says anything about Remembrance Day and patriotism she can only get a big fuck off from all over here.

With Remembrance Day done and dusted it wasn’t long before the next Biffer outrage, Tesco. Now I’m a grumpy fucker as the landlady can agree so my outrage at Tesco and others is that there are twelve days of Christmas and none of them are in fucking November but the biffer high command was incandescent with rage as Tesco had the audacity to put a Muslim family in their festive advertising, cue the biggest bigoted frothfest seen since, well since Remembrance weekend. Muslims celebrating Christmas, they spluttered it’s not possible. My next door neighbour is called Mo, his wife Fayez( I hope I have that right she’ll kill me if I don’t), and his kids are Muslim. He’s not devout as he enjoys the odd pint and bets on the Grand National but he attends the mosque every other day. He has already got his Christmas lights up on the house and as I write is going to buy a tree. You see they enjoy Christmas more than I do, they host a wonderful Christmas party which most of our road attend, invite my family round on Christmas Day. Someone needs to tell Screechy and Goldibollocks that the birth of Jesus has connotations in Islamic faith as much as it does Christianity. So to those fucknuggets at biffer high command, shove your outrage up your arse.

Outrage number two, and a video from Screechy. I can just see it now in biffer HQ, “we need to be outraged at something,” Goldibollocks and Screechy say, “read the newspapers, scan the airwaves find us something to screech at or else.” Then Steve sees it, tries to cover it up…….but it’s there……a sausage roll. A sausage fucking roll, but not any sausage roll, a Greggs pork sausage roll. The bakery chain held in high regard in biffer circles, had the audacity to make an advert with a sausage roll instead of Jesus in a nativity scene. Now I personally am a non believer, but if that outrages anyone then Christianity has gone to the dogs. I thought the advert was brilliant but the far right exploded in disgust. Greggs later pulled the advert but for fucks sake a sausage fucking roll upsetting the biffers……please.

There is going to be more outrage, that is without a doubt, so our poor biffer outrage machine needs replacing. Please please please, think of the admins, press the imaginary donate button and give generously. Maybe we may make our twelvty million target so Prole can go on a virtual holiday as she’s looking a bit pale recently, I can buy in a virtual barrel of ale and the others can have something better than Spar coffee.

Toodlepip

Let the outrage commence by Landlord

Beer 2The I’m outraged at ……. season has begun at Biffer command and watch out if your skin is slightly more tanned than theirs… you’re going to get it. As sure as eggs are eggs Poppy anger rolls into Christmas being banned, into Easter being stopped into St George’s day and then back to Remembrance Day again. You can set your watch, calendar or phone by it when frothing biffers recount tales of unicorns and pots of gold at the rainbow’s end – or lies as we like to call them.

The first unicorn instance started early, a guy in TfL uniform was accused of telling a poppy seller to get orf the land, cue outrage and the frothfest began. One of my colleagues actually sent a comment to TfL about it and was told that it happened in 2013 and he was actually protecting her. But it was enough for the bigots to fire the starting pistol on Muslim bashing.

The next unicorn instance came as England cricket players left to go to the ashes down under. In a team picture Moeen Ali didn’t have the obligatory poppy on his suit for the team picture, although he did have one later when they landed. But this was enough to start the foaming with super suds. Now I’ve actually met Mo at a cricket against racism event at the Oval, and I have to say he’s a lovely bloke. He is so proud of pulling on the Three Lions shirt, kisses the badge when he scores a ton and proud of representing his country, something Screechy and Goldibollocks and the high command can only dream of. If Moeen says it fell off I believe him more than the fucknuggets at Biffer Towers.

I noticed that as news of Moeen’s slip broke, Screechy and Goldibollocks were protesting about something or other and didn’t have Poppy’s on and neither did have the majority of supporters but we won’t make a fuss.

As regular followers of this page will know Screechy, Goldibollocks and the high command have a bit of previous with Poppy’s, the Royal British Legion and the false patriotism that they attach to it. They also have short memories about respect unlike Moeen. These are not made up details they are actual facts.

1. whilst an erstwhile member of the BNP Goldibollocks decided to wear underwear on his head at the cenotaph (rumours of them being Steve Lewis’s are as yet unproven) I haven’t seen Moeen do this as I suspect he thinks this is disrespectful.
2. The biffers try to sell poppy tat. The high command and the shittroopers have peddled their own crappy merchandise despite being asked to stop by the RBL. They didn’t and no money was ever received by the RBL even though the biffer blurb told their sheeple it would. The RBL have also said they wouldn’t take anything from them as they don’t accept donations from a political party. So Screechy and Goldibollocks have pocketed the dosh. There’s a video about too where an old man confronts Goldibollocks and a shittrooper about selling this. Goldibollocks in true biffer style then runs away. I doubt Moeen would have done this as it would be theft and a little disrespectful.
3. Last year Goldibollocks and Screechy sent their shittroopers out to various shopping centres and places where poppy sellers were. They instructed their accomplices to get selfies with the sellers and then posted these on Facebook saying they were guarding them from lefties and Muslims. This caused a such a furore as parents and military cadet organisations to request the removal of the pictures and had to issue statements to the effect of they didn’t know who the biffers were. Moeen I expect would only take selfies with fans of England Cricket, he’d never take selfies to pass them off as guarding pictures as that would be disrespectful.
So there you have it, a misplaced poppy, a foamfest from the cockwombles and racist comments from the bifferati. But there again who is the more disrespectful, Moeen Ali, a cricket player who proudly represents his country or a group of scam artists who rip off the RBL, use kids to further their hate and worship a thundercunt who walks around with y fronts on his head. The decision is yours.

Toodlepip

A view from a barstool 49 by Landlord

Beer 2So here I am again, a month after Britain First was imploding with allegations from nasty fascists against nasty fascists and the charges hanging over them. Fast forward a month and the Britain Firsts own Eva and Adolf are off on a European jaunt fucking over their supporters who blindly send money to a legal fund that appears to be funding the European invasion. The bollocks they spout about visiting fellow patriots across the continent they quite frankly hate. To be honest the only patriots they have been photographed with have been a confused looking youngish bloke and a dead ringer for a resistance member from ‘Allo ‘Allo.

The confusing question for the EBF team is why they have taken a fucknugget like Andy Edge, the walking talking EDL fuckwit, a man that camped outside a Rotherham Police station, went on hunger strike and wore the same t-shirt for two weeks. I say hunger strike… apparently kebabs, sandwiches and Stella weren’t part of the strike. He is also a convicted felon with question marks over his involvement in a case in Northumberland and missing funds.

BF EBF Golding with drunk Frenchman
Golding posing with a random drunk Frenchman

Before we go all ‘conspiracy theorist’ let’s have a look at the background to the hopefully final jolly for the fuhrers for some time. Firstly they have now been charged and bailed for racially aggravated harassment. In their words they “exposed Islamic rapists” but as we all know, they actually exposed nobody. In fact the people they ‘exposed’ had already been arrested and were being tried through the ‘Islam supporting’ judicial system, were found guilty and sentenced by a ‘lefty’ judge to 14 years imprisonment. Screechy turned up at an address where one of these rapists lived for a while but had moved and harassed the new occupants and caused distress.

 

Screechy and Goldibollocks did more to fuck up the trial than the defence.

They were charged and given bail conditions that curtailed their activities. In one video the team forced me to watch the fuhrers stated they will never surrender and fight it all the way.

“Oh by the way, you gullible cockwombles, could you send us 25k for our defence?” They said before promptly buggering off to Lanzarote.

We’ve heard and seen the rumours/allegations that have been floating around about Goldibollocks and further revelations about Jayda. More charges could be brought, perhaps they already have been but until we have irrefutable proof we won’t publish.

So here we are, the wankpuffins that are Britain First are unraveling before our eyes. Goldibollocks and Screechy are cowardly scam artists conning money from gullible vsheeple. They put up a front of togetherness when jealousy, distrust and hatred are the true order of the day.

The latest hilarious episodes just show how much they are trying to get their pensions paid by the blind fucknuggets that follow them. Firstly someone deleted their websites, the second they claim they want to sue UKRAP for using their lion. Hopefully they’ll get a few years behind bars, Britain First will go away and I can get back to drinking Hobgoblin.

Toodlepip

A view from a barstool #47 by Landlord

So here we go, some crappy important sounding music, a picture of somewhere news gets done, some smug idiot standing around shuffling papers……bugger this, it ain’t working, but anyway here is the EBF news, we would have done it on one of those crappy apps that the biffers use but the company involved wouldn’t take a packet of hobnobs and a half eaten Curly Wurly as payment, I told Foxy to throw in a Tassimo Latte thingy but hey here we go.

bf ebf jayda fransen paul golding arrested ramsgate court case may 2017.png

Anyway here is my take on the one story this week, the arrest of Goldibollocks and Screechy for inciting religious hatred. I’ve read their press release did some digging and done a biffer bullshit to EBF translation. Another begging email has gone out, after all it is coming close to the summer holiday needing to be paid for, anyway I digress….

Now the background from what I’ve seen. Screechy has been running around Ramsgate with her crew videoing her outside various premises where alleged rapists have been working or living and basically fucking up a police and CPS investigation that has landed the alleged perpetrators in court. It’s almost as if they saw what their new bestie Tommy was doing and decided we need to do some of that. Unfortunately (when I say unfortunately I actually mean hahahahahahaha) that didn’t turn out too well for Tommy either who was also nicked. Now for those trolls coming over for a visit we at EBF condemn those that break the law especially paedophiles and rapists, we just don’t judge them on the colour of their skin or the god they choose to follow. But anyway back to the translation.

Biffer release (BFR) We have to be very vague, as we are told Kent police have slapped some extreme bail conditions on them both which limits what they can say.

Landlord translation (LT) We’ve fucked up big time, we hoped that in this post brexit Britain a bit of incitement wouldn’t be noticed and we need to make it sound good to get some dosh out of you

BFR The police swooped on Paul and Jayda while they were driving by blocking the road and surrounding them with police vans.

LT We was having a lovely non Halal Curry with a nice British cup of tea and two coppers knocked on our door asking us to accompany them to the station. But that doesn’t sound good on the begging letters

BFR The raid included both uniformed and plain clothes CID officers.

LT Geoff from down the Dog and Duck was walking along the road but he was in civvies but we’ll count him as plainclothes as it sounds better on the begging letter

BFR It was a military style ambush that was executed with precision.

LT They knocked loudly and called me sir, and doesn’t it sound good on the begging letter

In all seriousness though what thorough cockwombles Goldibollocks and Screechy are. Along with Tommy and his camera buddy they were breaking the law of the land. They could now have put in jeopardy the trial of some men who may or may not have committed a disgusting offence and allowed them to be free to attack more young women. Goldibollocks and Screechy are a disgrace, this was done to incite their sheep to maintain their Islamaphobia, to fan the flames of hatred and to try and make money. It was made worse when someone took to Facebook to ask them to take one of their inciting videos down because they had the wrong address but no, they didn’t comply.

So both of them, as well as hopefully some of the other High Command are going to be prosecuted or at least we hope they are, but G&S you are, in this country, innocent until proven guilty. You don’t need vigilante cuntspangles camping outside your gaff spouting bollocks.

Final bit
BFR Will you chip in to help them fight this latest round of politically motivated persecution?

LT Pahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaa

Toodlepip