Fransen & Trump: A most undiplomatic incident by Landlord

Trump Fransen tweets shame.pngI was going to write my annual piss take with some Landlord friends of mine along the lines of I’m a racist cockwomble get me out of here. Instead with the diplomatic incident caused by Screechy and cohorts I thought I’d talk about that instead.

The media whores that are biffer high command think they have done it and have thrust themselves into the limelight. Questions in the House, multiple press interviews and a spokeswoman saying butt out. The reason, well, the Orange shitgibbon that calls himself president retweeted three of Screechy’s videos and now high command are wanking over the thought of all this publicity.

But far from leaving the team here at EBF banging our collective heads against the desk and giving up, as the dust settles and Screechy putting Biffer heads above the parapet it seems to have backfired spectacularly.

Biffer HQ have said they have been inundated with new members, probably from the US to rip off however a few extra Facebook likes and twitter follows are more likely the truth.

Fransen on the telly

The media reports have been to a letter uncomplimentary even Brietfart and the Heil being disparaging, those interviews I’ve seen show Screechy running out when questioned closely, the trigger question…”have you actually spoken to the Orange Shitgibbon?” They proclaimed victory over the odious and right wing LBC radio host Nick Ferrari when all I could hear was that she couldn’t answer any question he asked. They’ve even call Nigel Fartage a lefty now showing how far right they think they are. So the press ain’t helping them.

The questions in the House of Commons showed how much our elected officials think of the biffers. Although they had to be careful what they said so as not to prejudice future court cases.

Then along comes the sting in the tail, Screechy put their head above the parapet again and the press were ready. We’ve known about certain allegations for some time now, choosing not to say anything until they were substantiated. Goldibollocks is under investigation not for the size of his appendage but for a sexual assault. We understand that the investigation is ongoing but he, this paragon of Christian virtues, someone who confronts alleged wrongdoers (not bravely but with his shittroopers in tow) is now under investigation for the very thing he supposedly hates.

The press have also confirmed they are a group and no longer a “legitimate” political party. They failed to pay the £25 registration fee in time (must have spent it all on their jaunt round Europe). So now on their days of handing out the disgusting racist pamphlets on the streets one assumes they will be seeking council permission to do so.

The press have now intimated more forcefully than we could, the closeness between the biffers and the killer of Jo Cox and they’ve also shown two of the three videos retweeted by the cuntspangle in the White House to be bollocks.

So as the High Command prepare for their phone box racism (or conference as they like to call it) the biffers are starting to implode thanks to the white supremacist in charge of the western world, the two Fuehrers are on bail, Goldibollocks is being investigated for a sexual assault and the begging letters continue. There’s a hell of a lot more for us to raise our glasses to rather than bruise our heads on our desks.

Oh and Screechy, what time is your new bestie landing and getting off Air Force One to share a Vol au Vent?

Toodlepip

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A heartfelt apology by Landlord

EBF Fransen arrested.jpgI/we have an apology to make, in the two and a half years since I became an admin on Exposing Britain First I’ve never made an appeal but this week I’ve looked in petty cash, behind the sofa and all I found was 22p a half packet of hobnobs, a small jar of coffee, 33 mint imperials and a half packet of wine gums. The reason for looking……our irony machine and biffer outrage machines are fucked, they packed up and left the office sometime on Thursday and haven’t been seen since.

We urgently need twelvty million pounds or Ant, Foxy, Nemesis and Prole will be gently rocking in their office chairs and I and the others will bugger off down the pub to drink what is left of our funds.

Poppy outrage is over, mirth over as Goldibollocks tried to show reverence as he laid a wreath, at 4 o’clock and everyone else was tucking into their Sunday lunch or watching the Grand Prix. Reports that he was told he was not welcome at the actual parade are as yet unconfirmed.

Screechy meanwhile the upholder of all things British and on this most patriotic of days, conned the police so she didn’t have to sign on in Bromley and went, not to a Remembrance service, but to address a bunch of Polish Nazis. Biffer propaganda tried to spin it that she was talking to the 30000 Poles at their Independence Day rally when in actual fact she was speaking to a fringe of goose stepping Polish Fascists. Next time she says anything about Remembrance Day and patriotism she can only get a big fuck off from all over here.

With Remembrance Day done and dusted it wasn’t long before the next Biffer outrage, Tesco. Now I’m a grumpy fucker as the landlady can agree so my outrage at Tesco and others is that there are twelve days of Christmas and none of them are in fucking November but the biffer high command was incandescent with rage as Tesco had the audacity to put a Muslim family in their festive advertising, cue the biggest bigoted frothfest seen since, well since Remembrance weekend. Muslims celebrating Christmas, they spluttered it’s not possible. My next door neighbour is called Mo, his wife Fayez( I hope I have that right she’ll kill me if I don’t), and his kids are Muslim. He’s not devout as he enjoys the odd pint and bets on the Grand National but he attends the mosque every other day. He has already got his Christmas lights up on the house and as I write is going to buy a tree. You see they enjoy Christmas more than I do, they host a wonderful Christmas party which most of our road attend, invite my family round on Christmas Day. Someone needs to tell Screechy and Goldibollocks that the birth of Jesus has connotations in Islamic faith as much as it does Christianity. So to those fucknuggets at biffer high command, shove your outrage up your arse.

Outrage number two, and a video from Screechy. I can just see it now in biffer HQ, “we need to be outraged at something,” Goldibollocks and Screechy say, “read the newspapers, scan the airwaves find us something to screech at or else.” Then Steve sees it, tries to cover it up…….but it’s there……a sausage roll. A sausage fucking roll, but not any sausage roll, a Greggs pork sausage roll. The bakery chain held in high regard in biffer circles, had the audacity to make an advert with a sausage roll instead of Jesus in a nativity scene. Now I personally am a non believer, but if that outrages anyone then Christianity has gone to the dogs. I thought the advert was brilliant but the far right exploded in disgust. Greggs later pulled the advert but for fucks sake a sausage fucking roll upsetting the biffers……please.

There is going to be more outrage, that is without a doubt, so our poor biffer outrage machine needs replacing. Please please please, think of the admins, press the imaginary donate button and give generously. Maybe we may make our twelvty million target so Prole can go on a virtual holiday as she’s looking a bit pale recently, I can buy in a virtual barrel of ale and the others can have something better than Spar coffee.

Toodlepip

A view from a barstool 50 by Landlord

Beer 2I love how my autocorrect suggests potatoes instead of Patriots…

So as the dust settles on the biffer soap opera, here in the office the BBC bleep machine would be going into overtime censoring the admins as we digest the news that Screechy and Goldibollocks have managed to walk away from court and the sheeple that follow them have declared victory over the commie cops and judiciary.

But what exactly have they won, as sure as the clocks go back each year a begging email comes out asking for twelvty million paaaands (or £25k in anybody else’s parlance) and the racist cockwombles lap it up. Could this be the last payment to the gruesome twosome, a sort of pension as the biffers implode, or the first of many such emails to string out their so-called political careers.

Over the last few weeks the feuhrers have had a holiday in Lanzarote and met some meaningless potatoes across Europe sticking two fingers up at the law they insist Muslims abide by.

So is there evidence of the biffers imploding, finally giving EBF followers what we’ve been working for for years well yes……..and no and here’s my view.

1. The high command appear to have been frozen out, Lewis, Lomax and the others in the bunker were overlooked for the jaunt in favour of head potato Andrew Edge. Andrew is ex EDL and not a nice chap. He was convicted of assault on police at an EDL rally in Birmingham and spent time inside, he also took part in a hunger strike outside Rotherham Police Station. I say hunger strike, sandwiches, kebabs and Stella didn’t count as food in his eyes. I would place a small wager that Screechy and Goldibollocks do not particularly like Edge but that he is being kept close to stop further charges that Goldibollocks doesn’t want out.

2. There is a real chance that our heroes will go down for the charges they face. For those of you living in a bubble it appears they attempted to harass the accused in a rape trial almost causing a mistrial, harassed people who had moved into one of the accused house and frightened them so much as they published the address. The accused were rightly found guilty and sentenced in accordance with the law Screechy and Goldibollocks hold in such contempt. Given their previous surely jail time can’t be far away. They have pled not guilty to these charges although their wonderful videos seem to have provided the evidence required to prosecute them.

3. The new allegations. We deliberately have kept quiet about these as we are still unable to substantiate them, apart from the cowardly assault by Goldibollocks on a fellow Biffer, something he has pled guilty to. Some fairly big and nasty people seem to have it in for Der Fuehrer and there seems to be evidence of this as the leaders left court furtively looking around and wanting to get the hell out of dodge, they had no black shirts surrounding them(see point one)

4. They appear to be trying desperately to shore up some more support from their dwindling numbers of potatoes on the ground, from Jean Marie Le Penn’s fascist group in France who gave Edge a €5 keyring (made up to be a medal of honour) to other fascist groups across Europe. Screechy also appears to have waded in on Edge’s pet project, the Justice for Chelsey campaign that other hideous fash seem to have taken over. Now we don’t know what happened here but the Northumberland police and the CPS dropped the case after inconsistencies in statements were found, no DNA and no cctv evidence were found. But as sure as night is day Screechy turned up and the fuehrers seem to be trying to recruit.

5. Against them being jailed is just one thing. Speaking to various professionals in the legal field, police and judiciary the recent abscondment across Europe should have been enough to have them remanded in custody the fact they walked free, however temporarily, has the office in near apoplectic shock. Are they grasses?? Do the police just want them clear so as not to make martyrs of them or are the magistrates just stupid beyond belief to believe the bovine excretia coming from their mouths. What is different from before is they haven’t banged on about their bail conditions this time and we wonder if they are slightly more draconian than before.

Now I’ve been forced to watch their recent videos, and most(all) of the things they state are total lies. The good potatoes of this country said riot police with shields went into the demo to arrest Jayda, that they pushed old women to the floor, a dog got choked. We have checked and nothing like this happened. What you can be sure of is that the publicity whore that Screechy is was aware she would be arrested and did it to increase tensions.

So I wouldn’t go back to just posting pictures of your dinners and fluffy cats just yet as the fight continues, this pleases our local supermarket as their sales of hobnobs and coffee would drop off hugely, and I will still be forced to watch their videos. Although why I have to do this in the pub as my locals think I am a drunken bum with Tourette’s. In actual fact I think we shall have to make up a new malady…….Biffer Tourette’s, there is no cure just hobnobs, Hobgoblin and coffee.

Toodlepip

A view from a barstool 49 by Landlord

Beer 2So here I am again, a month after Britain First was imploding with allegations from nasty fascists against nasty fascists and the charges hanging over them. Fast forward a month and the Britain Firsts own Eva and Adolf are off on a European jaunt fucking over their supporters who blindly send money to a legal fund that appears to be funding the European invasion. The bollocks they spout about visiting fellow patriots across the continent they quite frankly hate. To be honest the only patriots they have been photographed with have been a confused looking youngish bloke and a dead ringer for a resistance member from ‘Allo ‘Allo.

The confusing question for the EBF team is why they have taken a fucknugget like Andy Edge, the walking talking EDL fuckwit, a man that camped outside a Rotherham Police station, went on hunger strike and wore the same t-shirt for two weeks. I say hunger strike… apparently kebabs, sandwiches and Stella weren’t part of the strike. He is also a convicted felon with question marks over his involvement in a case in Northumberland and missing funds.

BF EBF Golding with drunk Frenchman
Golding posing with a random drunk Frenchman

Before we go all ‘conspiracy theorist’ let’s have a look at the background to the hopefully final jolly for the fuhrers for some time. Firstly they have now been charged and bailed for racially aggravated harassment. In their words they “exposed Islamic rapists” but as we all know, they actually exposed nobody. In fact the people they ‘exposed’ had already been arrested and were being tried through the ‘Islam supporting’ judicial system, were found guilty and sentenced by a ‘lefty’ judge to 14 years imprisonment. Screechy turned up at an address where one of these rapists lived for a while but had moved and harassed the new occupants and caused distress.

 

Screechy and Goldibollocks did more to fuck up the trial than the defence.

They were charged and given bail conditions that curtailed their activities. In one video the team forced me to watch the fuhrers stated they will never surrender and fight it all the way.

“Oh by the way, you gullible cockwombles, could you send us 25k for our defence?” They said before promptly buggering off to Lanzarote.

We’ve heard and seen the rumours/allegations that have been floating around about Goldibollocks and further revelations about Jayda. More charges could be brought, perhaps they already have been but until we have irrefutable proof we won’t publish.

So here we are, the wankpuffins that are Britain First are unraveling before our eyes. Goldibollocks and Screechy are cowardly scam artists conning money from gullible vsheeple. They put up a front of togetherness when jealousy, distrust and hatred are the true order of the day.

The latest hilarious episodes just show how much they are trying to get their pensions paid by the blind fucknuggets that follow them. Firstly someone deleted their websites, the second they claim they want to sue UKRAP for using their lion. Hopefully they’ll get a few years behind bars, Britain First will go away and I can get back to drinking Hobgoblin.

Toodlepip

Britain first’s radical creation

How many times has Britain first protested at Finsbury Park Mosque?

How many times has Britain first called for white non-Muslims to rise up and take action against the Muslim ‘invasion’?

How many times has Britain first told its followers that they’re in a civil war against Muslims?

How many white British people have been radicalised by Golding and Fransen?

BF EBF Finsbury Park Mosque propaganda

How many British Muslims will be radicalised by atrocities such as the one perpetrated against innocent worshippers at Finsbury Park in the early hours of this morning?

Britain First isn’t just a profiteering organisation making money off the back of radicalised racists. It’s also one of Daesh’s most effective recruitment mechanisms.

EBF BF Dowson Holy War crusade comboTheresa May has pledged to clamp down on far right hate preachers. We suggest she starts with Fransen, Golding, Lomax and Lewis. We demand that the British government proscribe Britain First as a terrorist organisation and place all its ‘officers’ and activists on trial under the prevention of terrorism act.

We demand that this is done without delay. We further demand that hate preachers like Katie Hopkins, Nigel Farage, Paul Nuttall, Tommy (Yaxley-Lennon) Robinson also stand trial for inciting hate crimes against Muslims, refugees, immigrants and non-whites.

Come on Prime Minister – you’ve said you’re serious about prosecuting hate preachers. Now’s the time to get on and do it. Let’s not have yet another U-turn.

A view from a barstool #47 by Landlord

So here we go, some crappy important sounding music, a picture of somewhere news gets done, some smug idiot standing around shuffling papers……bugger this, it ain’t working, but anyway here is the EBF news, we would have done it on one of those crappy apps that the biffers use but the company involved wouldn’t take a packet of hobnobs and a half eaten Curly Wurly as payment, I told Foxy to throw in a Tassimo Latte thingy but hey here we go.

bf ebf jayda fransen paul golding arrested ramsgate court case may 2017.png

Anyway here is my take on the one story this week, the arrest of Goldibollocks and Screechy for inciting religious hatred. I’ve read their press release did some digging and done a biffer bullshit to EBF translation. Another begging email has gone out, after all it is coming close to the summer holiday needing to be paid for, anyway I digress….

Now the background from what I’ve seen. Screechy has been running around Ramsgate with her crew videoing her outside various premises where alleged rapists have been working or living and basically fucking up a police and CPS investigation that has landed the alleged perpetrators in court. It’s almost as if they saw what their new bestie Tommy was doing and decided we need to do some of that. Unfortunately (when I say unfortunately I actually mean hahahahahahaha) that didn’t turn out too well for Tommy either who was also nicked. Now for those trolls coming over for a visit we at EBF condemn those that break the law especially paedophiles and rapists, we just don’t judge them on the colour of their skin or the god they choose to follow. But anyway back to the translation.

Biffer release (BFR) We have to be very vague, as we are told Kent police have slapped some extreme bail conditions on them both which limits what they can say.

Landlord translation (LT) We’ve fucked up big time, we hoped that in this post brexit Britain a bit of incitement wouldn’t be noticed and we need to make it sound good to get some dosh out of you

BFR The police swooped on Paul and Jayda while they were driving by blocking the road and surrounding them with police vans.

LT We was having a lovely non Halal Curry with a nice British cup of tea and two coppers knocked on our door asking us to accompany them to the station. But that doesn’t sound good on the begging letters

BFR The raid included both uniformed and plain clothes CID officers.

LT Geoff from down the Dog and Duck was walking along the road but he was in civvies but we’ll count him as plainclothes as it sounds better on the begging letter

BFR It was a military style ambush that was executed with precision.

LT They knocked loudly and called me sir, and doesn’t it sound good on the begging letter

In all seriousness though what thorough cockwombles Goldibollocks and Screechy are. Along with Tommy and his camera buddy they were breaking the law of the land. They could now have put in jeopardy the trial of some men who may or may not have committed a disgusting offence and allowed them to be free to attack more young women. Goldibollocks and Screechy are a disgrace, this was done to incite their sheep to maintain their Islamaphobia, to fan the flames of hatred and to try and make money. It was made worse when someone took to Facebook to ask them to take one of their inciting videos down because they had the wrong address but no, they didn’t comply.

So both of them, as well as hopefully some of the other High Command are going to be prosecuted or at least we hope they are, but G&S you are, in this country, innocent until proven guilty. You don’t need vigilante cuntspangles camping outside your gaff spouting bollocks.

Final bit
BFR Will you chip in to help them fight this latest round of politically motivated persecution?

LT Pahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaa

Toodlepip

A view from a barstool #46

Another week where those in Bifferdom have finally cracked and sending more clickbait with than the PPI companies do on Facebook. “Share if you like fluffy unicorns but only if they’re British, share if you love British Castles and so on and on and on zzzzzzzzz. Are they running out of money to buy likes? Then they come out with a picture of an antelope called a dik dik (not Lomax and Lewis in their security garb) found in southern Africa and asked us to share if we love British wildlife. Spectacular own goal chaps……

This week we celebrated International Womens Day and Screechy published a picture of her holding a Qur’an and telling us about the way women are treated as second class citizens etc etc etc. Any chance of Muslim bashing hey Screech! Now I’m not a follower of any religion (or fashion) nor have I read the Qur’an, the Bible or Tanakh or Enid Blyton’s Famous five ( I was much more a Secret Seven man) but even a rudimentary check on Google and you find something pretty demeaning to women in all of them. Again interpretation is the name of the game, which Screechy plays very well.

EBF Twitter Jayda Fransen Chris York Huffington Post interview offerWe hear that Screechy and Goldibollocks don’t run from anything or anyone, the typical media whores that crave coverage wherever they can get it. Screechy published a story about two street preachers being arrested on Twitter, one of this page’s friends, Chris York from the Huffington Post tweeted back and asked her and Goldibollocks for an interview, just the three of them, anywhere they wanted, with a chance to get their point across and answer a few questions. The reply, bluster and deflection. In publican terms brave patriots Goldibollocks and Screechy ran away. So Screechy you know how to get in touch with Chris, I would guess the offer still stands!

As I have written before, with the world lurching horribly to the right and the policies put in place, racist attacks have increased. This is no surprise to us here and at TellMama and far right and neo Nazi arrests have doubled. No doubt biffer towers will put out a release telling anyone left who gives a shit on their page that this is lefty journalism and establishment propaganda. This in fact was in the Telegraph. The far right are emboldened by recent political moves and they feel it’s their right now to attack the defenceless, the majority aimed against Muslims as the rhetoric from world leaders want to beat them into the ground. Well this won’t do, we need to fight for our friends and neighbours now more than at any other time. A biffer favourite is about Creeping Sharia and halal slaughter of which it is abundantly clear they know fuck all about.

Another of our favourite fuckwits, Katie Hopkins just got sued for defamation, I’m hoping this will lead to more people calling her up on her hatred and lies. She is one of the islamaphobic cheerleaders either because she knows it winds more people up, more exposure, more noteriety, more money or it’s because she is a racist fucknugget and thinks a right wing revolution is happening and she’s the one to lead it.

Finally it’s coming up to Easter… cue general biffer frothing about the chocolate eggs from various companies not having Easter emblazoned on them in huge letters. A few things for Screechy, Goldibollocks and the rest of the right wing shittroopers to take note. Firstly, it’s a chocolate fucking egg…I have 5 kids who couldn’t give a toss whether it’s called Easter, summer, pagan or whatever. It’s a chocolate egg which is eaten as quickly as possible. Secondly, Easter is still on the packaging it isn’t Muslim appeasement it’s sensible marketing. Thirdly and someone may put me right but in my limited knowledge of the Bible I never knew there was a big fuck off chocolate egg with a toy or chocolate in the middle. But every year, just like Christmas, St. George’s day, Remembrance day and on and on and on and zzzzzzzzz the far right say our Christian identities are being taken away. And like everything else they say – it’s all a load of bollocks.

Well that’s it for this week, the biffers going bonkers, the fascists being locked up, a hated columnist guilty and having to pay and the frothing sheep having a go at Cadburys. All in all a fucked up time to be a follower in bifferdom.

Toodlepip