View from a barstool #44 by Landlord

Beer 2As 2017 comes in and we can at least bid a non-fond farewell to 2016 I was wondering just what this new year had in store for a grumpy, lefty, Muslim apologist landlord. I’ve had a look back at the year just gone, one in which it seems you can bomb the fuck out of somewhere, killing children, and a year that seems to justify fascism.

In Syria bombs continue to rain down on Aleppo, killing indiscriminately. Now I have an admission to make… I’m not particularly up on who’s doing what, where over there. I just can’t stand the fact that a whole bunch of innocent people are being killed by the west, Russia, their own government, Daesh and lack of food. The Biffer trolls’ favourite saying is “they should stay and fight” but fight whom, with what? Should they shoot the odd (not so) smart bomb with catapults?

Brexit has seemed to galvanise the right into thinking bigotry and abuse of anyone slightly off white is acceptable. Twitter and Facebook is awash with so-called celebrities writing statements that over a year ago would have seen them hauled over the coals. It seems that it’s ok to go up to foreign looking chappies and chappesses and tell them to “Fuck off home” even though their home is here. It seems ok to invade places of worship because their god is different to yours. It seems ok to racially abuse people in the street, all because a non-binding referendum seemed to say we hate foreigners.

Brexit send them back T shirt   Walsall halal butcher arson petrol bomb brexit

Well Katie Fucking Hopkins you failed at business, you failed at being a celebrity and you will fail at your pathetic attempts to shock. You see we laugh at you. I don’t care how you voted, as long as the reason wasn’t racial.

2016 also saw the deaths of many celebrities. Now call me a grumpy cuntspangle but I don’t see anyone as better than us, my television is limited to Sky Sports and peppa pig. I’m also someone who as a bar manager at Thorpe Park barred Katy Jordan (or something) as I really didn’t “know who I am” when she screamed at me. However during my formative years I did listen to a lot of Status Quo, a bit of Bowie, read a lot of Richard Adams and loved Star Wars so I am sorry they lost their lives. I also say RIP to all those who lost their lives in senseless wars, so called terrorist attacks or anything else.

The Americans have also managed to get the rest of the world united in a collective facepalm as they voted in a racist buffoon who is both financially and morally bankrupt. Us ‘lefteyes’ better run for cover… fuckwit is coming to town.

And now my favourite part of 2016, the beginning of the end of Bifferdom. They crave publicity and money. They want to be a “legitimate” political party who make all others quake in their boots. They want to outlaw a religion, not as they tell it but because it makes them money. What sort of year have they had? Well it’s been brilliant.

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They’ve got a new camera, Screechy appears to have increased by a cupsize or two, Goldibollocks and Stevie’s waistline seems to have expanded. The two leaders have criminal records, Goldibollocks being interned at her majesty’s pleasure for ignoring a High court injunction and Screechy for bullying a young Muslim lady. They failed to make any inroads in politics. Screechy, Goldibollocks and his mum/family failed even to make a blip on the BBC’S colour chart in the mayoral election. Their conferences and road shows were supported by the same 20 followers, despite having twelvty million likes on Facebook. So the Biffers were a failure too.

As I look now to 2017 what can I expect. Well probably more of the same. Although teetering on the edge of annihilation whilst there is still money to con, the Biffer High command will continue to talk bollocks and fail in almost everything they do. Hopkins will continue to talk shit and no one will listen. Trump will bankrupt the US and the West will continue senseless bombing of countries that might have oil, or pipelines owned in part by media moguls.

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But there is something I saw over the recent festivities, a coming together of all faiths (and none) sticking the proverbial two fingers up at Trump, Fartage, Daesh, Bifferdom, Hopkins et al. The left, centre and centre right all beginning, to use a movie quote to “be excellent to each other”. You see we, the normal non-bigoted people are fed up of all this cuntwaffle from the Nazi far right and have had just as much as we can take.

So I’m not giving up smoking, drinking or meat. My resolution is to be excellent to all. Apart from Biffers they can fuck off.

Toodlepip

A view from a barstool #43 by Landlord

christmas-beerI have to admit that I was finding it pretty difficult to work out what to write this week, I mean just how much regurgitated shit can you manage to read or hear before getting writers block, until the Christmas present that was the incarceration of Der Fuhrer, so here it is, my take on the best and funniest news we at EBF have had all year.

Goldibollocks, you see, like the rest of his High Command think they are above the law, that when they are arrested, interviewed or confronted by the police that this is a plot by the establishment to silence them and the twelvty million supporters they purport to have. Well Goldibollocks, well Screechy, well shittroopers I have news for you, it’s not. The reason you are harassed, arrested,bailed or confronted is because it’s against the law.

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Now it’s hard not to laugh at them, I know believe me, but trying to be serious for just one paragraph this is a quick résumé of what Goldibollocks did to get banged up. Earlier this year, to great fanfare and video on their page Goldibollocks, Screechy and the shittroopers visited Bury Park in Luton for a Christian patrol. Screechy went batshit crazy and verbally assaulted a young Muslim woman whilst bravely surrounded by the shittroopers and quite rightly Bedfordshire police got miffed about it. Screechy and Goldibollocks were bailed with certain stringent conditions. One of which was not to go into a mosque in the British isles without written permission. When it was time to come to court he played a blinder pled guilty and got a criminal record, Screechy was also hauled up and also got convicted of her part in the Bury Park fiasco. One thing remained though……..no more mosque invasions.

bf-ebf-fransen-golding-luton-courtWhilst Screechy was out of the picture Goldibollocks and some pretty unsavoury activists went to Cardiff and entered a mosque without prior written consent, Goldibollocks says he didn’t go in but he was definitely the unhinged mastermind behind it. Thinking they had got away with it how they laughed. However behind the scenes the authorities decided that bending over and being fisted by the biffers on a weekly basis was pissing them off and hatched a cunning plan. Fast forward to Screechy’s trial and the announcement that Goldibollocks was to be charged for contempt of court. After much hissing and screaming at the establishment Goldibollocks relinquished control of Bifferdom to spend more time with his family. The more cynical amongst us knew this was a blinding legal move on his behalf as he could say he no longer had control.

On Thursday he went to court played a blinder, pled guilty and expected a slap on the wrist. Naughty boy Paul but as we’re so frightened of your online masses and your plethora of MPS, MEPs and councillors we’ll let you out just don’t do it again, was what he, his legal team and the biffer High command thought would happen. By all accounts his bottom lip trembled as he was told you’re going down for eight weeks, 4 suspended. You see Screechy, Goldibollocks and the rest of your tacky insignificant crew people get fucked off with being constantly disobeyed and you went too far.

Now we could go over the top and take the piss more, we could ask that he’s banged up with Muslims, or someone who calls him Pauline, but the others have too much class for that. Instead I’d like him to spend the 4 weeks in solitude, snivelling like the cowardly fuck he is. He won’t have his shittroopers there, no one to hold his hand if someone says something nasty to him.

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I hope prison will break him, make him scared shitless, I hope that he’ll come out chastened by the experience, but I doubt it. In fact if you read comments from biffer towers you’ll see the twats are out and Screechy wants money to appeal. Appeal, fuck off you conning bunch of fucking arseholes. He pled guilty end of.
One of the comments I loved was,

“I bet if it was a Muslim he’d be free.”

To which one of our regulars wrote

“Hmmm, like Choudary.”

So what next for the biffers? Well Screechy will continue with her soapbox, spouting all sorts of absolute garbage, Stevie will continue his one man assault on Gregg’s, the shittroopers will continue to look as menacing as my little ponies and in 4 weeks time a fucked up Goldibollocks will emerge to the waiting throng of twelvty million press and sign a multi million pound deal with Brietbart to screen his life story. In all honesty, we just don’t know. One thing we are sure about is that this will lead to some more conning, a huge amount of racist and religious bigotry and Screechy screeching.

One more thing you can be sure of, once the offices collective hangover goes we’ll be there to fuck them up, we’ll be there to highlight their lies, we’ll be there to highlight their bigotry, we’ll be there to counter their get togethers and we’ll be there to highlight their cons.

But for this weekend I’m getting pissed, and staying pissed. Maybe, just maybe this will curtail their activities and that is something to raise a glass of Babysham to over the Xmas break. Now if you’ll forgive me I’ve got an unopened bottle of expensive Valpollicello to uncork and toast His Honour Judge Moloney for having the bollocks to stand up to the bully.

Toodlepip

Golding’s going down!

bf-paul-golding-prison-1We’ve waited a long time for this news. Sometimes we thought it would never happen. The big celebratory packet of chocolate Hobnobs has sat gathering dust on the EBF office shelf for far too many months, neglected and ignored. Only Kit would occasionally take it down from its place by the Facebook admin rota and stare deep into its plastic wrapping as though willing the chocolate out from between the oaty goodness within.  With the iron determination of a Biffer waiting doggedly for evidence she steeled herself for a long delay before the celebrations could begin. But now she waits no longer.

Today in the High court Paul Golding finally got his cummupance. He’s gone down for 8 weeks. Admittedly it’s not long and he’ll no doubt be out in four but that’s still a fair amount of time for someone who’s never been in prison before. It’s a Hell of a long time for Golding to be without his minders. Not exactly known for his courage Der Fuhrer never goes anywhere without his bodyguards.

He’s hated by the left for being a Nazi. He’s hated by the right for being a scam merchant. He’s hated by Muslims for stirring up trouble. He’s hated by the authorities for his contempt of the law. And he’s all alone without his bouncers. Good luck in there Paulie!

What’s the reason for his awful Christmas and New Year incarceration, I hear you ask? Well – according to Deputy Fuhrer (sorry – acting Fuhrer) Fransen…

Britain First leader Paul Golding has been sent to PRISON for confronting a hate preacher who said it is okay for Muslims to keep sex slaves!

But that’s not strictly true. Actually it’s because he breached a High court injunction forbidding him from entering or encouraging/allowing others to enter any Mosque in England & Wales without prior written invitation. Fransen does eventually admit this but not before attempting to rustle up as much outrage from the sheeple as she could…

Today, at the High Court in London, a judge decreed that this breached the Luton police injunction forced on us a few months ago

It’s also not true that the Imam in question said it’s permissible to keep sex slaves. In fact he was discussing passages from the Quran and placing them in proper context. His conclusion was that it’s actually NOT permissible. The whole Mosque invasion wasn’t just illegal, it was based upon an obvious lie. Golding and his Biffers were well aware of the truth before they set out to Wales that day but as ever for the Biffers – why let the truth get in the way of a good publicity stunt?

Fransen’s rant goes on to complain that Paulie’s poor little life is in danger because of corrupt left wing judges and vicious Muslim gangs running the prisons. You know – the same Muslims who according to Britain First never get convicted of anything, ever because of our corrupt judicial system. We have to wonder what these imaginary Muslim gangs might be doing in British prisons if, as the Biffers never tire of telling us, they never get convicted of anything but that’s for another time.

We do think Goldie might be at risk, but not from Muslim gangs. We think he’s far more likely to be hurt by the genuinely violent underbelly of British culture – middle-aged, white, far-right racists who resent the fact that Golding’s constant begging for money and pointless posturing has starved them of funding. There are plenty of disgruntled EDL in the nick who’d just love to take a pop at Goldibollocks.

Whether he gets hurt or not is a moot point though. The fact is he’ll be shaken by the experience. A tin-pot fascist without his protection is a snivelling little nobody. This sentence sets a precedent that has been a long time coming. The next breach is likely to attract even bigger sentences, even more jail time and it’s hard to imagine that little Paulie will be up for doing any more ‘bird’ in the foreseeable future. Fransen seems to us to be much more courageous (after her infamous loss of confidence in Burton) and we’d expect her to be the next Biffer to go down. Or maybe Lomax for benefit fraud. We’ll have to wait and see about that one.

Either way the writing is finally on the wall for Britain First. They may not know it yet (although we think they do) but we can expect stiffer and stiffer penalties from the establishment from now on.

So with that in mind…

Come on Kit – open those Hobnobs!

View from a barstool #40 by Landlord

Beer 2A couple of weeks away and all hell has broken loose with right wing shenanigans. The hairpiece is going to be the most hated, powerful man on this planet, Thomas Mair is convicted of Jo Cox’s assassination with right wing undertones with pictures showing him on a day of activism with the biffers, Goldibollocks standing down to take time out(hopefully) at her majesty’s pleasure and a convicted felon taking over in our Screechy. And now proof that all is not well in bifferdom.

In my own world of cyberspace my American friends are unable to take in the way their country has voted. Admittedly they were sceptical of Hillary Clinton who is as trustworthy as the biffers but for their fellow countrymen to vote in a sexist, racist, bankrupt twat is enough to have them crying into their Buds. Some say that this just proves that the Americans are crazy but I personally feel that it is more sinister as more and more countries are seeing surges in support for the far right. Some have even dressed it up as ‘alt-right’ but I’ll call it how I see it, ‘deep rooted racism’.

Possibly Tommy Mair Dewsbury BF demoThe assassin known as Thomas Mair was convicted this week and as a white man I apologise for his terrorism. As the racists keep asking normal Muslims to apologise for Daesh I will get in first. Whether or not when he shouted “Britain First” he meant it as a battle cry or as a tribute to his favourite racists no one can be sure but the deafening silence from biffer towers and the pictures of him at one of their wanky days out prove it to me. The Nazi paraphernalia found shows that once again a line white terrorist is as bad as the Daesh ones.

So Goldibollocks has stood down, temporarily at least to spend more time with his family. That is laughable to say the least as his family now accompany him to all his roadshows to help swell the numbers to double figures. The fact that the blind disciples don’t see is that the jail time Goldibollocks is hopefully going to get just so happens to be 6 months…….a coincidence, a conspiracy theory or some time in Uncle Jim’s racist enclave. Whatever it may be we here at EBF towers and the majority of our followers will be giggling at his predicament like schoolgirls.

That brings us to the convicted felon who is taking over from Goldibollocks, Screechy take a bow…..or don’t as your cleavage is getting quite an airing on your soapbox….your ambition has been reached, Uncle Jim has his own way and the hierarchy that have been slowly inching away from Goldibollocks into her camp have their own way. During her trial, and if you listen to the biffers she was a modern day Joan of Arc, she was stoic in her defence and was only convicted by lefty magistrates and the gutter press. Now I’m a novice in things legal, apart from the licencing law, but the overwhelming evidence produced by the CPS convicted her in two out of the three charges.

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In a way I’m glad she wasn’t jailed, and I can’t believe I’ve just said that, but the High command are looking for a big pay day and a martyr doing pokey, especially their pin up girl would almost certainly boost their coffers. I’d love Goldibollocks or indeed her to do community service in a Muslim area.

Screechy and Goldibollocks are so keen to remind anyone in earshot or on social media that they are a political party, all be it with no seats in any council, parliament, parishes or the EU, they constantly ask would any other party leaders be treated the same. So Goldibollocks and Screechy I’ll ask something to you……I don’t see Theresa May, the Libdem leader, Jeremy Corbyn or any other party leader being a convicted felon, being associated with an assassin, or ripping supporters off for cash.

I have also seen the ex biffers chatting amongst themselves,some very close to the hierarchy, proving that what we publish is true. A block on talking to any other group, a ban on a members husband who isn’t white, milking money and being rather sexist. I really want to be there when they implode because there’s nothing funnier than watching the death of a nasty racist right wing group.

So there it is, a racist group, followed by a terrorist, run by felons and bankrolled by a zealot. That is Britain First.

As we hurtle to Christmas the landlady appears to want me to do something called shopping, something a grumpy Landlord never understands so forgive me if this is a bit short.

Toodlepip

Tony Carmelo – another Nazi thug from Britain First

bf-tony-carmelo-fransen-luton-trial-attackLast Thursday, November 3rd we heard that Jayda Fransen had been convicted of religiously aggravated harassment and wearing political uniform. Why she wasn’t also done for failing to surrender to bail is a bit of a mystery but that’s OK. It was the least important of the three charges against her.

This was the reaction from Tony Carmelo, a regular Biffer attendee and all round arse-wipe that evening. Showing just how little respect Britain First has for British law and British customs, Tony (I’m a big kid) Carmelo has decided that he wants to batter someone. Like the rest of Britain First, Carmelo lacks the intelligence to handle not getting his own way like a grown up.

And just look at the uniform in the pic he posted. For fuck’s sake Tony – how neonazi can you get?

Oh well, off you go and beat up some poor sod. That’ll make you feel better, won’t it Tony?

But who is he going to batter? Now there’s a question.

It won’t be the Judge – that’s for sure. Even he isn’t that stupid. And it won’t be the police – all the Biffers ever do when the police are about is hide behind them. So that leaves people who can’t defend themselves and who had nothing to do with the court case anyway.

The fact is Jayda broke the law and has to face the consequences.

Only a childish bully would want to hurt an innocent person because he didn’t like the outcome of a court case. That’s why Carmelo fits in so well at Britain First. They’re all childish bullies.

Jayda’s not as clever as she thinks she is!

If you enjoyed hearing about Jayda Fransen’s conviction for religiously aggravated harassment last Thursday you’re probably in for a treat. Watch out for the sequel.

Alongside the conviction, fine and costs Jayda was also served with a two year restraining order preventing her from further harassment or intimidation of the victim. That’s a full two years before she can hassle the poor woman again…

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http://www.itv.com/news/anglia/2016-11-03/britain-first-deputy-leader-guilty-after-hurling-abuse-at-muslim-woman-in-hijab/

How long do you think she waited? Well actually not very long at all. Less then a day in fact. Either Britain First has no sense of time (which may explain why they behave as though it’s some sort of alternate timeline 1950s Britain with Enoch Powell in charge) or they’re just really, really stupid. I’ll leave you to make your own minds up about that.

bf-dejected-jayda-fransen-leaving-luton-maghistrates-court-after-trialThe fact is that almost before the ink was dry on the restraining order they were at it again. Paul Golding released an 11 minute long video slagging off the victim, the judge and the police, relying heavily upon extracts of CCTV that presumably were made available to BF as part of court processes and not for the purposes of further harassing the victim. We think that’s also a potential misuse of legal process. That’ll be for the courts to decide for sure though.

Britain First presumably thinks they’re clever by posting their video having a go at the victim everywhere EXCEPT Fransen’s own webpage but that in itself is suspicious, isn’t it? There’s no plausible deniability in that – especially when Fransen remains the group’s Deputy Leader. There’s no way she wouldn’t have known about it.

Even if they could get away with the Golding video there’s no way the court could ignore the many shorter videos produced by Jayda herself in which she tries to excuse her own behaviour by pinning the blame on, you guessed it, the victim. The way both Golding and Fransen repeatedly and clearly contemptuously refer to the victim as the ‘white, Muslim convert’ demonstrates not only their own racism but also the thinly disguised assumption of ‘treachery’ intended for their equally racist followers to pick up on.

Forgive us for not linking to the videos in question but we’ve no wish to intimidate the victim any further. We have, of course passed the video’s URL on to the police. It’s the least we could do in the circumstances.

No wonder Jayda didn’t look happy leaving the court. She’ll be leaving via a different route next time with any luck.

Jayda discusses her show trial

bf-jayda-fransen-discussing-show-trial-lutonIt wasn’t a show trial, you stupid bint. It was a run of the mill, common or garden hearing in a Magistrates court to deal with a petty criminal.

I watched your video. You didn’t discuss the trial at all – not in any way that made sense.

You showed an edited video making it look like the other party started it.

Why don’t you show us the beginning? You know – the part where you single out the woman because she’s white and that goes against your small-minded idea of what Muslims should look like. Why not show us that part?

Why don’t you show yourself crossing the road to have a go at her in front of her kids?

Why don’t you just come clean and admit that you’re a great big fuck up – just like all the rest of Britain First?

You won’t do that because you’re just a liar. You and your arse-wipe leader, Golding. He’s a liar too. I was amazed at how many of your lies EBF has exposed when I started reading back through their blog and the Facebook memes of yours they’ve shown up. That’s why it’s so great to have been asked to join them. I can help put the final few nails on your coffins, you fuck-witted, neonazi scumbags.

In your video you soon stop talking about the trial altogether. No surprise there – there’s nothing you can say that won’t show you up for the sulky, whiney child you really are. So you go on to talk about the judge instead. If you thought that would make you less whiney, you’re wrong. It just makes you look even more stupid… and whiney.

Face it Jayda – you fucked up, you got caught, you have to take the shit that comes with it. That’s the British legal system.

If you don’t like our laws, Dutchy…. Fuck off back to Holland!