Cable Street: 81 years and still No pasaran!

It’s exactly 81 years since the people of Britain held back the first incarnation of uniformed British fascists at the East London barricades of Cable Street. Responding to a Europe-wide trend of Fascism that stretched from the Eastern European Slavic states to Italy, Spain and Germany, the British Union of Fascists sought to make Britain a far-right dictatorship along the lines of Hitler’s Germany. Vehemently racist and anti-Semitic, the BUF was led by Oswald Mosley, an English aristocrat who saw international Jewry as the enemy of the world and who believed passionately in the ‘dog eat dog’ struggle of social Darwinism. For Mosley and his supporters, democracy was a weakness, Nothing short of violent revolution would be sufficient to realise the Blackshirts’ dream of one nation, one empire and one leader. Mosley seems to have learned that from his German friend and mentor, Adolf Hitler whose Nazi party slogan, Ein Volk, Ein Reich, Ein Fuhrer was a strong influence on the BUF and its upper echelons.

The British Union of Fascists was one of several far-right organisations in 1930s Britain. The Right Club and The Nordic League (also both with ties to Nazi Germany) were less well-known but equally fascist in their ideals. There was significant cross-over in membership and all were profoundly racist and anti-Semitic. All preferred dictatorship over democracy and all saw Hitler, Mussolini and Franco as role models.

The BUF was the one with most appeal to the working class though. The Blackshirts combined street violence and visceral prejudice with political policies that scapegoated the vulnerable and sought above all to maintain the privileged status quo that, despite oppressing most of their supporters, did at least allow them to feel superior to Johnny foreigner. In that respect the BUF was a cross between today’s UKIP and Britain First movements and its divisive policies clearly serve as inspiration for both.

Golding may not have the courage of Mosley, a genuine war hero and the Biffers may be only a pitiful parody of the genuinely disciplined Blackshirts but don’t let that fool you. Their objectives are the same, even if they have no chance of organising themselves sufficiently to achieve them.

On Sunday October 4^th 1936 things came to a head. Mosley and his deputy William Joyce had planned to hold a march, a show of strength to further harass and intimidate the many Jews living in the district. They had amassed between four and six thousand BUF supporters, all smartly uniformed and well-disciplined like a tight-knit military unit to march through the area as  part of the same time-honoured ‘march and grow’ strategy so favoured by modern fascist groups like Britain First and the English Defence League. Unfortunately for the fash things didn’t quite go according to plan.

They arrived in East London to be met by well over 100,000 opposers from all over Britain. The intended route anticipated the Blackshirts marching down Cable St, an important thoroughfare that stretched from Butcher Row all the way to Dock St. To march unopposed down Cable St would have meant a strong symbolic victory for Mosley’s fascists, allowing them to claim dominance over the most multi-cultural part of the city, arguably of the whole country. Cable St.  was the prize and Cable St. was where they must be stopped.

Barricades were erected along the route from furniture, vans parked across the road, mattresses, sandbags, even suitcases. Every entrance to the street was blocked. Even the junction with ‘Golding St.’, named after the Jewish jewellers who worked there was secured. Although not in the least ironic at the time, this has certainly raised an eyebrow or two since, leading many to speculate about the true heritage of Der Englander Fuhrer, Paul Golding himself.

What followed was a three-way battle between Mosley’s fascists, the anti-fascist crowds who had come to block their path and the beleaguered and outnumbered police who tried vainly to secure a path for Mosley and his men. Many would later claim, indeed still do claim that far from remaining neutral the police actually fought alongside the BUF against the protesters. We at EBF make no claim to know the truth of this but given the political climate of the day it seems at least plausible to suppose that they might have.

What we do know is that the Blackshirts did not pass the Cable St. barricade. We know that many, including Mosley himself were injured in the violence that ensued that day and we know that the East End of London won a victory that resounded not only throughout the nation but across the decades as well.

Never again has any fascist organisation gained the sort of popularity that the BUF enjoyed all those years ago. Never again has the British population allowed any far-right group from the British National Party to the National Front and the English Defence League the space to grow unopposed. Never again will fascists get to intimidate our citizens in the sort of numbers our forefathers saw in the 1930s.

This is our legacy.

This is the legacy of Cable St.

This is why Britain First is doomed never again to muster more than a few dozen supporters to their real world events.

The spirit of Cable St lives on in the national mindset and through the memory of that epic stand the Great British people continue to echo the proud, strong slogan of East London’s finest pre-war hour…

They shall not pass!

A view from a barstool #39 by Landlord

“It’s the most wonderful time in the world” so the Christmas song goes. Nope the grumpy, athiest Landlord hasn’t taken leave of his senses nor has the barmaid ran off with me. It’s the time that some unwashed lefty landlords and I get together to do CAT tests on the promotional barrels of Hobgoblin (rather a lot of them) and discuss all things fascist and how we go about countering them around the country. Also they help me to write this blog. Last year they helped me on Bigot brother or big Bigot, this year we have come up with a new soap opera, Bigot Street. Hopefully someone picks it up or it could be a bigger failure than Eldorado. Forgive me any typos please, writing this after a few pints of the nectar probably isn’t the best time to do this.

This is set in a street that the fash dream of, a late 50’s terrace and people leaving the doors open. At number one a rather rotund gentleman known as Goldibollocks lives, a British flag or seven decorating both front and back, so it appears there are more people there than is thought, he appears to be the leader of the gang. He doesn’t work for a living just cons everybody and pretends to be a political heavyweight whilst being shit scared to enter into debates.

At number two is a loud mouthed harridan called Screechy who spends her days again not working but living off the begging bowl. Everyday she changes her security arrangements paid for by unsuspecting members of the public that think she does more than just screech at anybody that doesn’t pray to her particular god. She also tells all that she is a legal whizz having studied at Bigot Street’s local college, ‘The School of Hard Knocks’. She appears to have a hatred of anyone that doesn’t think the same way or is slightly tanned. She was in awe of Goldibollocks but now appears to be happier with her uncle.

Number 3 is the local newsagents, ran by a man who everyone calls Uncle Jim. He seems to like black and white flags and calling for crusades. He has all the newspapers in the shop, The Express, Mail, Brietbart. He’s the local lay preacher that hates homosexuality, Catholics and Islam. This could change depending on who he can fleece the most out of. He hates socialism but seems a bit taken by the Russian president.

Number four is a Fatman who works at the bakery. This bakery sells nothing but pies. He is a touch more literate than the others and although the bakery never opens although there always appears to be pies there in the morning. Mr Lewis is also treasurer of the streets council as he has the batteries for the calculator and the typewriter. He also can’t be trusted with the local church fêtes banner as it seems he loses them too easily.

Number Five is lived in by security guard Lomax. He is never seen without a stab vest, body camera, dodgy gloves and heavy walking stick. He seems obsessed with Screechy and Goldibollocks as he follows them everywhere they go like a faithful lapdog. He really should be licenced but can’t con anyone to put him through the course as he is too far down the hierarchy of Bigot Street. He is most likely to run in the opposite direction of anyone tanned.

Next there seems to be a confused gent. He hates immigration but has a name like Carmelo. He seems hell bent on getting into the A team and climbing the ladder of the hierarchy and closer to the honeypot. He seems to want to take on the immigrants with a stab vest, camouflage and a ruler.

At number seven, although on the outside of the main team is Nasty Nick. He seems to have talked his way in by sucking up to Uncle Jim. He has political ambition and appeared on the TV being owned by an audience. He wants all his fellow bigot’s to follow him to Hungary to set up racist world but no one wants to invest.

At number eight, although his house has the number 228 on it is a chap called Broomfield. He has the number 228 as although a paid up member of the gang he is an embarrassment to the high command.

Here I must stop with the houses, mainly due to the fact the Hobgoblin is taking effect.

At the end of Bigot Street there is a pub. A real olde world one with bar billiards (would have been a snooker room but Screechy and Goldibollocks kept taking it for filming). This pub sells great British beer like Stella, Carlsberg and Guinness. The top shelf of Smirnoff, Bacardi and Jim Beam, you know none of that foreign muck here. The Bigot’s stand around the old Joanna singing patriotic songs and wishing it was 1958 when blighty wasn’t overran by johnny foreigner, we all sang the national anthem and we respected the law of the land (as long as it wasn’t made by communist police and the lefty lackeys of the judiciary. The bigot’s talk long into the night deciding that a wall round their street complete with machine gun nests and barbed wire before toddling off for a non halal kebab.

So that’s the idea, I only need firty faaaaaaasand paaaaaands to get it off the ground. Can you chip in.
TARGET firty faaaaaaasand
Amount conned a midget gem, a marshmallow, three buttons and a safety pin.

Anyway, I should be back next week cuddling another barrel and reporting on all things biffer if the hangover goes and I have bought a big enough anniversary present for the wife.

Toodlepip

View from a barstool #38 by Landlord

A Screechy special

A lot on at Landlord towers as my eldest daughter dumped her boyfriend after he called me a lefty do gooder and a Muslim appeaser. She found out he was a biffer and promptly told him where to go. The youngest son is being marched to the local mosque during the half term break after calling Fatima a fat Paki bomber and although said in the heat of the moment he realises that I or my wife won’t stand for this and time for him to learn.

By now you will have seen the latest begging email for Screechy’s defence at her forthcoming witch hunt sorry court case. This email was funny it has the landlady thinking I’m close to running off with the barmaid as I chuckle long into the night. This being so I’ve decided that this week’s blog will be all about the harridan and not the way the publicity seeking biffers would like.

The Email starts and immediately my chuckles begin. She is according to the high command “an extraordinary woman” and asks whether I have ever seen a young lady with more courage, bravery and guts as our Screechy? Well Goldibollocks yes I have. From Florence Nightingale, the suffragettes, the women who fought in the world wars and those since then. The doctors and nurses, cleaners and all those in the NHS, The policewomen putting themselves on the front line (usually keeping the peace when fucknuggets like Britain First come to town.) Fire women who help keep us safe and the female members of our armed forces and the lady who lives down the road who’s husband died leaving her with four kids. Instead of turning to the welfare state she has two jobs and looks knackered all the time. These are examples of extraordinary women not someone who’s sole aim is bigotry and conning money out of people to keep her lifestyle.

Paragraph two, pass me the gag, she has been abused by the police while confronting Anjem which is so far away from the truth. She confronted him for the publicity, when she knew Choudary couldn’t say anything because of his bail condition she also turns up with her shittroopers. This isn’t brave this is cowardly. The Email goes on that she is harassed by anti terrorist police (send me a number for a divorce lawyer quick) now forgive me for this but in this world of terrorism I’m pretty sure that the security services have better things to do than harass cockwombles.

It continues, “now the corrupt PCC’s are dragging her into court with the intention of jail time.” Again forgive me for laying it straight but if you don’t break the law of this land you won’t be prosecuted or face jail time.

The edict from biffer high command then goes on to list her crimes and although we’ve covered them before I’ll laugh my way through them.

Firstly, the aggravated racial harassment, to which biffer high command says Screechy was attacked first. Now I’ve seen the videos, both of them, and even the biffers own heavily edited video appears to bear out the fact that the abuse stemmed from one person and one person only, again flanked by her shittroopers and bodyguards she appears to abuse a women and when the woman starts to own her she cries abuse. Again not courageous but cowardly.

I notice that the other two charges aren’t listed on there, could it be she may plead guilty to wearing a political uniform bravely capitulating like her beloved Fuhrer. And not answering to her bail conditions which she so bravely ripped up in front of a camera then found out she was in breach and defiantly pleaded not guilty to.

So the to the crux of the email. Not five, not seven and a ‘alf not even ten but can you focus a favour and give us fifteen faaaaaaasand paaaaaands because you are getting fucked off with us and fings are so expensive nowadays. I mean Screechy might have to get a job if you don’t.

The Email asks me if I ever knew of a more courageous woman. I’ll leave it up to you to decide but in all my years I’ve never known a bigger coward, and hopefully a jailed, humbled coward at that. I started off in EBF feeling rather sorry for Screechy but that has changed to almost, and I stress almost, a dislike.

So that’s it, I’ve come through this week I’m not sure about the divorce but as our legal fund is bare could you please send hobnobs, midget gems, pot noodles and Marmite to us just in case. We don’t like to ask but hey why not?

Toodlepip

A view from a barstool #37 by Landlord

Well then here we are again, nights drawing in, central heating fired up, logs for the fire delivered and stored, Pimms back in the stockroom until either Wimbledon starts or someone remembers they like it (along with the babysham and Blue Nun I’ve forgotten about for years). And the biffers still twatwaffling on about things that happened years ago.

As we were reliably informed by biffer towers they’ve reached 1.5 million likes for their tawdry page on Facebook. “Bigger than any other political party” they say, proof that “Britain wants Britain First” Now not one to put a dampener on this lads but Britain doesn’t want you, there’s 40 odd million other Facebooking souls in the UK and as you quite like to say after the referendum the majority have spoken. Also they quite like to bandy the phrase “legitimate political party” about quite regularly but which other legitimate political party has no local council seats, no MP’s, no MEP’s, no mayors and have a conference in the back room of the Dog and Duck. In fact their argument has more holes in than their accounts.

Ah, says our pet troll, you only have 91000 likes you are just jealous. Well me ol’ mucker we aren’t. We don’t pay to promote our page, we don’t pay for likes or use clickbait. The admins and followers have been brought together because of the lies, bigotry and downright racism of the conmen and women that are Biffers. We, all of us, work bloody hard to expose them at every turn.

We also, don’t, when the cash cow that is their British followers catch onto their cons and won’t pay to stop Goldibollocks and Screechy having to get a job turn to bigots and racists across the Atlantic or the other side of the world to fund ol’ uncle Jim. In fact we are pretty sure that if uncle Jim could con money out of Russian communists there would be a “Red First”

Away from this, Screechy’s court case is rapidly approaching. She wen’t  missing for a while (perhaps she was with Jimbo in Hungary) but our EBF satellite and drones eventually picked up her screeching voice in Telford. Maybe the signal didn’t reach to Hungary so we had to wait until she got back to her beloved Britain before we could detect her raucous tones. The truth is we don’t really care because as long as she feels the full force of the law next month we’ll be happy.

She and the Biffers can’t play their silly little games this time, no petulant ripping up of bail conditions, no sending their shittroopers to a town to stick two fingers up at the authorities… just silence. The reason, if all being fair, she could be spending time at her majesty’s pleasure, could be hearing the opening titles of Porridge (go on admit it you’re saying it now) and we and many, many others will be making virtual high fives all through the Britain she claims to love so much.

I hate to bang on about anything but one thing I must ask, please tell your families, mates, pets and neighbours. The Biffers and other scammers are due out again, trying to get you into parting with your money for Remembrance Day. Please make sure you only give to the RBL and don’t let the fucknuggets get any money intended for veterans.

Now back to the stockroom. I’m sure there’s a case of Lambrini there somewhere.

Toodlepip

View from a barstool #36 by Landlord

Another week of looking at the biffer page, another week of thinking I’m in a time warp. Watching the latest videos they’ve posted, well I say watching, I don’t watch them I just read the résumé that the other admins write I really believe that whoever is in charge of the asylum has barricaded themselves in Biffer Towers and changed the passwords to the account.

The recent trip to Oldham which,according to the high command, is a no go zone for white Christians passed off quietly apart from squealing bagpipes and,it appears, total disinterest by shoppers. A video was posted of Goldibollocks using a microphone to talk to a couple few so called islamists or peaceful shopping Muslims as I like to call them. Could it be people who are anti biffer or even pro biffer cannot be arsed anymore and treat the cockwombles with indifference. Once again the same twatwafflers were there, Goldibollocks’ shit troopers and a couple of activists that we have all seen before. So much for their “we have faaasands of new activists signing up.”

The latest begging email was an absolute hoot. Please can you “chip in” to enable us to pay to replace a camera after one of our activists had our usual one broken in a deadly attack by a radical islamist outside the East London Mosque, you know the one, a kick aimed at the retreating, rampaging biffers fleeing because they decided to be cuntish trying to stop prayers…..and the kicker, despite being caught on camera has never been caught (our moley even intimated that it was one of their own missing a Muslim). Anyway I digress, this camera according to the high command is £995. Surely they can’t think their sheep are that stupid and would check, but no, we did it for them, and it only costs half of what they asked. In fact, since I have been an admin for just over a year I have done a quick add up and apart from election funds, they have asked for just shy of quarter of a million quid. I would ask you all if you had any ideas where the money has gone but I can guess the response.

Finally, now we have replenished our hobnob stocks, I wonder what ideas you all have about the location of the next day of inaction. Answers will probably not be rewarded with Hobnobs but treated for the comedy value they normally are.

So that’s it, week over and I’m hoping that when I look at my calendar it will show I’m still in 2016 and not in the early noughties

Toodlepip

A view from a barstool #35 by Landlord

Ha!!!! 1-0 to me, both over the Landlady who made me rebuild the pub garden for the kids only to see 2 days of drizzle, and after last week’s ‘view from a barstool’, over the biffers as they duly posted the poppy burning story. So a smug, grumpy landlord is writing this week.

Still no word on the erstwhile absence of Goldibollocks and Screechy and although we, at EBF towers really couldn’t care less we’ve been putting forward ideas as to what had happened to the cockwombles in chief, ranging from Stevie mistook them for a mobile Greggs and was sitting on them to Screechy temporarily joined a nunnery whilst Goldibollocks converted to Catholicism and was hiding from Uncle Jim. Yifter though had the boring idea that they’d used the latest begging money to visit the Westboro Baptist Church to exchange ideas. Whatever it  was, maybe,whoever had been left in charge of their page just locked the door, put a cabinet up against it and spent their time laughing maniacally on an old search engine which struggled to find anything past 2010.

Their roadshow continues this time in London. At the moment the location is a closely guarded secret but guesses on Twitter and Facebook both on where and how many attendees would be gratefully received for no other reason it will give us a laugh, we may even be able to send a penny chew to you as hallowe’en draws near.

The truth is while the biffer high command are away and the twatspangle who runs the page in their absence is posting all the ancient, rehashed shit that he/she is it’s really difficult to concentrate on bifferland and to write much. I might even have to do some actual work.

Toodlepip

A view from a barstool #34 by Landlord

Well there’s a thing, another week of lovely warm sunshine keeping winter at bay and I’m getting it in the neck from the Landlady for putting away the summer play things in the pub garden, I blame the weathermen who told me it was going to be a short Indian summer.

I have a question to ask. Are you ready for the Biffers silly season? Yep it’s that time again. As Autumn hits our shores the biffers propaganda ministry will go into overdrive. Muslims taking control of government and councils to harm all British patriots’ way of life. Hallowe’en, Remembrance Day, Christmas, the usual shit fuelled by the bastions of truth The Sun, Mail and Express.

So lets have a look at these Great British traditions one by one. These traditions that every year are supposedly shut down by Islamic leaders, every year we see hysterical headlines and social media statuses that are basically either downright lies or twist the story to such a degree that Muslims are made to be the evil ones fuelling an already slow burning hatred that has got worse since the referendum.

Hallowe’en, the day when parents all over the country, who normally wouldn’t let their kids go round knocking on doors or talking to strangers, allow their kids to do just that. This last year was supposedly banned in a lot of areas. It wasn’t in most places and where it was it was the police and councils fearing anti social behaviour. Again we saw headlines in the gruesome threesome and fuelled the hate.

Remembrance day – the day British Patriots adore as once more they can pretend to be more patriotic than the rest of us. Age old stories will be regurgitated, poppies being burnt, Muslims disrespecting the dead, Muslims stopping remembrance marches and Biffers adding security to armed forces cadets selling poppies.

The poppies were burnt, yes but a long time ago, the people doing it were dealt with there and then and they were rightly convicted and fined. It reminds me of the pictures I saw of a certain BNP racist cockwomble wandering around the cenotaph with a pair of Y-fronts om his head. If you havent seen this before this arsewipe has become leader of a “registered political” party.

Our memes last year documented the hundreds of thousands of Muslims who died protecting our freedom. Their relatives must be wondering why right now.

Finally, on Remembrance Day , or at least on the run up to the day Goldibollocks tells his shit troopers to go and “protect” the army of cadets who collect money for veterans from the hordes of lefties and Muslims that are out to desecrate the memories of the fallen. Except they don’t protect…..they hide away until any adults have gone off then get a selfie with the cadets, place it on Facebook and the dickwads that follow the page eat it up. The Biffers respect our fallen so much they sell tat, dressed up as British Legion merchandise and pocket the money for their own grubby means.

A friend of the page, John McKnight has been asking Goldibollocks where the money raised has gone. Ask yourself the question then, who disrespects the fallen more, Muslims, lefties, Foldibollocks or the biffers.

Finally Christmas, I don’t think there is a day goes by in November or December that a headline in the gruesome threesome, a meme or a link to an ultra right wing think tank that doesn’t say CHRISTMAS GETS CANCELLED. Now I don’t like Christmas apart from my coffers bulging but each to their own. The Muslims I know celebrate the day, maybe not as christians do but still give presents, invite friends for a cocktail or three (grrr not spending in my gaff) and generally enjoy the time as much as a certain grumpy landlord. Also, in the afternoon, Naz opens his store for forgotten things and fags. The reasons lights, decorations or trees don’t go up is not Muslims, grumpy landlords or athiests it’s because councils can’t afford it, health and safety or a myriad of other reasons.

MUSLIMS DO NOT WANT TO CANCEL CHRISTMAS!

But it doesn’t matter to Biffers. Any article in the propaganda sheets will be siezed upon and twisted for their own gain to keep the anti Muslim sentiment going.

I would offer a packet of toffee chocolate hobnobs if you manage to see a positive article about any of these but I checked EBF coffers and we seem only to have half a packet of midget gems, two packets of quavers, a bottle of Lambrini and a packet of hummus.

Now back to the job, putting back up the climbing frame, swings and benches…..wheres my hammer.

Toodlepip

A view from a barstool #33 by Landlord

I sit here basking in the late summer sunshine, beer in hand, kids running about (now finally back at school). I’m wondering what the fuck brexit means, whether my life would’ve been better had I been to grammar school and I’m watching the paralympics on TV, marvelling at how these athletes overcame disabilities to perform at the highest level with more patrotism than the combined darkside of the far right fucknuggets.

And that brings us on to all things Biffer. An upcoming trip to Wales, begging letters that appear to show desperation, videos that probably were filmed on Betamax they’re so old and finally a sighting of the lesser known Screechy.

The next stage of the Biffer roadtrip moves into Wales, probably countered by Antifa, which we here at EBF Towers call musical chairs. We have to say that Moley doesn’t think many will turn up apart from the usual hierachy, so called ‘security’ and a few knuckledragging racists. I did wonder if, instead of building a wall in Calais, we shouldn’t build one round Wales to stop Goldibollocks and the high command coming back. Then I remembered that I love Wales, having holidayed on the Pembrokeshire coast during my formative years and have quite a few mates living there. It will be another jingoistic display, probably begging for money and full of anti Muslim and lefty rhetoric.

To the begging letters, which according to Der Fuhrer will stop for a bit (probably as they’ve paid for his trip to the all white enclave Uncle Jim and Nick Griffin have set up in Hungary) have become almost hilarious, definitely desperate and possibly fraudulant. Now “donations” are being paid into their “Merchandising” account as their normal account has been frozen by their provider, probably because the provider has worked out that they are racist spunktrumpets which goes against their terms and conditions. So once the company returns the 7.5k, the muppets have got 15 faaasaaaand paaands in their account. However, Team EBF reckon HMRC might be interested in it. Whatever it is it stinks worse than Stevie Lewis on a hot day with no deodorant.

The videos are even worse. The high command seem to have ramped up the islamaphobic sentiment on their page. They seemingly trawl through Youtube finding any slightly brown people gathered in a town causing fights and Jim’s your Uncle – Muslims riot, Muslims beat someone up, Muslims this or Muslims that. The trouble is these are videos from years ago, some not in this country and most don’t even show Muslims. On one of their feeder pages they even decided to publish a video of a Christian hate preacher being drowned out by bagpipes and dressed it up as a Muslim hate preacher being drowned out. Even when some of our page readers told them what the original was about their sheeple and disciples had already decided their version of the truth.

Now I haven’t really missed her but she’s finally surfaced. The lesser spotted Dutchy ‘screechy’ Fransen finally was spotted in Birmingham. On one of their increasingly inflammatory days out, countered by antifa, Screechy was seen chatting to the Police. We think, well I do, that she was probably checking that she hadn’t broken any bail conditions. Talking of bail conditions did Goldibollocks break his when they invaded a Mosque in Cardiff? BBC say that the Mosque have complained about the invasion so watch this space.

So thats it then, the week in Bifferdom… lies, possible fraud and another roadtrip. Hopefully another week closer to their closure. Disgusting as they are I still laugh at the majority of their antics. Time now for another pint, a quick tab and get the new pool team to take the game seriously.

Toodlepip

A view from a barstool #32 by Landlord

As I rapidly approach my first anniversary as an EBF team admin, I thought I’d share a few before and after snapshots of my life as an admin on this superb page, fash fatigue and the laughs and tears that we’ve shared in this time.

Before joining Team EBF I was very much fighting the right wing, trolling various pages with mates and making an annoyance of ourselves. The EDL, various Infidel pages, Casuals, and of course Britain First all had visits. But thinking back on it, it never made any difference to the way they thought. To bastardise a Farage (ugh) phrase, “racist means racist.” Although it was fun, and made me many new facebook friends I wasn’t going to change the knuckledragging idiots nor stop their disgusting lies.

Then out of the blue I was messaged by Prole who asked me if I would like to join the page (knowing now what I’ve learnt about selecting admins I feel very humbled), I didn’t take long to agree, the Biffers are the worst of the knuckledraggers, so I was introduced into the murky world of all things Goldibollocks and the guys behind the page.

My world changed. My day now consists of getting the kids up for school and on the way home stopping off at the corner shop for a dose of nicotine, caffiene energy drinks and a quick peruse of the front pages of the fash bibles, the doom and gloom twins aka the Fail and Liexpress. When I get back in, it’s cash up and get the pub ready and check twitter, Facebook and the world media for stories that help debunk the lies peddled everyday in Bifferdom. I stopped buying newspapers and watching the news when I got into fash fighting, I realised that propaganda comes in many guises so I just stopped. To this day I can’t bring myself to visit the Biffer page, as I like most of you are banned I just screamed “LIES” but can do nothing about it. Fortunately others in Team EBF have a tougher resolve, they are evenable to sit through the video’s that Screechy puts out with her voice and the hideous lies that they peddle.

After opening the pub doors, I’m able to answer pm’s to page or your links. Again these are invaluable to us as we always miss something (akin to the landlady always spotting a stray cobweb when I finish cleaning the living quarters) I also have a lovely chat to Reg, a lovely 60 year old Rasta and his wife and Mo the postie about life and the problems they, as darker skinned members of the community, have endured. Then it’s back to work on the page, discussing within the team whether such and such should go up, proof reading memes etc etc and that’s how it goes on all day, discussions, decisions and scheduling.

An accusation that gets thrown at us quite regularly is that we are terrorist appeasers, Muslim apologists, muslims and lefty traitors. The terrorist atrocities carried out over this past year have left the office in a stunned silence many of the team in tears, me a six foot plus barman with a lump in my throat, and an unspoken question of how can we defend this. The answer my friends is we don’t. Like every other right (left) minded person on this planet we can see that these murders are carried out by a miniscule percentage of so called religious zealots who are hell bent on circulating fear. Bomb somewhere and get wall to wall coverage for the next week from a media who have an agenda. Then watch every right wing page do your bidding and spread fear and islamaphobia across social media, in fact Daesh’s social media boss must have the easiest job in propaganda circles. So we don’t defend it, we publish stories that show the other 99.9% of Muslims hate Daesh as much as we do, are affected by the same feelings as we have, but they unlike us are vilified.

Then there are the good times, the Southend Network news piece about the hot cross buns, Kingsmill loaves being Halal, Cadbury’s Easter eggs no longer having Easter on them all of these and others sending the frothing biffers into apoplexy and us into fits of pissing ourselves.

There are also the begging Emails and video’s that make me wet myself at the gullibility of their Sheeple, the Election campaigns, Mosque raids, and so on that we need to counter and we do.

There you have it, a year in EBF, a year in which I have learnt about who TellMama, Hope not hate, KTI,Jim Dowson and Joshua Bonehill are. A year in which Champagne moments are mixed with lukewarm cheap lager days, but never ever boring.

Toodlepip

​A view from a barstool #31 by Landlord

A hot week at Landlord central this week as our British weather finally realises it’s summer and the bright yellow speedos come out to play. I am reliably informed that this heat has been sent by Europe so biffers, kippers  and brexiteers please move to a cold area where you don’t have to sample the EU weather.

The news in brief, the government have decided to strip apart the human rights act, the French have gone apoplectic about a swimsuit of choice, the big breweries have hiked beer prices and in the US Trump met Farage for a kind of Racist get together, oh and a beardy sat on the floor of a train as there were/weren’t any seats left depending on your persuasion.

So to the news about biffers. Well mosque invasions, begging mail, old videos, the continuing absence of Screechy and the odd biffer troll accusing the admins of the page of being Muslims who are brainwashing readers of the page to our wicked ways( I’m sitting here with a particularly fruity Merlot and a bacon butty so by all means be brainwashed by me. Call the police I’m obviously radicalising you all).

Last week, Goldibollocks, and a team of shittroopers visited Cardiff to invade a mosque, demanding with menace, that a cleric stops preaching something that was debunked easily. They seem to visit on a Saturday, nowhere near prayer time when nobody is about apart from elderly gents going about mosque business. Needless to say, we have sent this information to the authorities as this appears to be in flagrant disregard of the conditions set up and accepted by Goldibollocks by the court.

The latest begging mails are nothing but hilarious, they seem to have forgotten Screechy’s legal fund and now requesting money for leaflets as they are getting more activists, although we have only seen the same racists in every picture or video. They could be coming to a town near you soon so please keep your cameras handy and send them to us.

The biggest question in the office, well not the biggest, ok my question, in actual fact no one cares but Marcia told me I have to ask it, where’s Screechy. Please can everyone look down the back of the sofa, under the bed(cringe). It seems like the biffer pin up has put a piece of tape over her gob and gone into hiding. I believe, and it’s my opinion only, that she was close to a coup, close to deposing der fuhrer, but Goldibollocks got in first and left her fucked. First he pled guilty to his charge, told her not to and left her facing jail time, secondly his high command have stopped begging for legal costs. It’s now all about him.

Finally we were visited by a cat, accusing us of being Muslims, being a one man band, radicalising you guys. Just about everything the biffer trolls do in several attacks. Just to reiterate we are several, atheists, Muslims, Christians, agnostic and human. We believe bigotry in all forms is wrong. So when we get trolls like the one we had we laugh, smile for screenshots and wait for “la grande flounce”

So that’s it for now, another week over and the barmaid has put another bottle next to me to enjoy.

Toodlepip