A view from a barstool #29 by Landlord

Beer 2I’m back, a few weeks away as my business took off and no time to watch,listen and take the piss out of all things biffer.

Whilst I’ve been away there have been numerous opportunities for them to post their bile and islamophobic nonsense. Brexit, whether you voted for it or not, seems to have given the green light for the unsavoury few to carry out nasty, racial attacks. The murders in mainline Europe seem to, in biffer minds anyway, have got the Islam haters in a tizz and want to start a civil war, despite the fact that France, America et al are bombing the shit outof civilians in Aleppo and elsewhere whilst the true ememy, Daesh sit around laughing while the biffers and Western Governments do their propoganda for them. British armed police alongside G4S are ready for them. I trust our police, just, but G4S, I don’t trust them to even read my electricity meters.

As I watched from afar, the biffers have gone on a camping trip, which although very funny, was also quite sinister. Screechy was strangely quiet, but more about her later, Goldibollocks has gone into full begging mode, and the rest of the shittroopers and high command have had their racist routines curtailed by the exasperated police forces.

Goldibollocks has been in court. He says he has pulled a blinder, instead he has basically fucked the Biffer high command over. He came out and produced a triumphant video telling his sheeple that he had completely put the CPS into a frenzy by pleading guilty. No, Goldibollocks, you haven’t. You now have a conviction, however you want to dress it up, and a criminal record to boot. Also if any of the shit troopers and high command go out on their leaflet days with hoodies etc, the Police now know they can arrest them and point to the guilty plea by Der Fuhrer and Jims your uncle…….conviction.

BF Goldong stitch up court jayda fransen magistrates charges.png

As I write this on Friday afternoon, Screechy is probably having her case heard in Luton. Now in her case there is more to it than Goldibollocks having three specific charges against her.

  • Charge one, wearing political uniform. Now I’m no legal eagle but if Goldibollocks pled guilty there is no way Screechy can go not guilty.
  • Charge two, failing to surrender to bail conditions. Not guilty she says, but again how can she. In one of her memorable video’s she ripped up her ail conditions and said she would no longer sign on, how she can plead not guilty to this is beyond me.
  • Charge three, racial aggravation, again not guilty she says. Even a heavily edited biffer video can see Screechyis the aggressor, flanked by her bodyguards(who to me are hilarious fucknuggets) openly intimidating Muslims going about a shopping trip.

If the biffers think that they were the only ones who are allowed to make videos then they are even bigger fuckwits than I think they are, this and the fact we live ina country with the largest amount of CCTV camera’s in Europe, you would think that this may have made her think again. According to friends that are in the know on legal matters, the CPS have to have an overwhelming amount of evidence before beinging the case to court.

With my small amount of legal knowledge, fighting this case is pretty futile. If Screechy pulls a “blinder” and pleads guilty she gets away with a fine and a suspended jail sentence, but if she does that police forces and councils around the country can apply for the same banning orders as Beds Police. If she pleads not guilty, and goes to crown court, not only is there a possibility of jail time, there is also a possibility of being held on remand.

Whatever they decide watch out for begging letters, video’s and buckets.

Finally before I go and change a barrel, the biffers triumphant roadshow went to Coventry last week, and a massive 25 patriots turned up. Take off Screechy and Goldibollocks along with thier shittroopers a total of about 12 were there. They are alledgedly turning up in Cardiff soon. They may call it a roadshow but I like to refer to it as a game of musical chairs.

Toodlepip,

Landlord

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Unanswered questions about Jayda’s bail conditions

It’s no secret that I was disappointed at the outcome of yesterday’s hearing at Luton Magistrates’ Court. I had hoped that Jayda Fransen would be remanded in custody, given her previous failure to comply with bail conditions until she appeared in Crown Court. I really wanted this destructive harridan removed from the public sphere right away even if the result would be a reduction of sentence for ‘time served’ when she is finally sentenced by the Crown. Unfortunately, that was not to be. But what did actually happen?

BF Jayda Fransen after luton magistrates court august 5th 2016We only have Jayda’s own account of the outcome and, as usual with Britain First’s pronouncements, the brief video statement she released from the back of a car as she left the court left more questions than answers.

What was the reason for the delay? Fransen helpfully explained that she couldn’t report from outside the courthouse because of the hordes of Muslims driving aggressively up to her in cars. This is odd for several reasons.

Firstly – our spotters on the ground report that there was no sign of any aggressive or erratic driving. In fact there was a bit of a traffic jam which would have made it quite impossible.

Secondly – Luton Magistrates Court doesn’t open out onto a main road so she could easily have given the piece to camera from the steps without any chance of motorised interference.

Thirdly – and perhaps most tellingly – there’s no Britain First video of these hordes of motorised Muslims.

Britain First videos everything they think might make useful propaganda. If Fransen really was being harassed and intimidated by hordes of Muslims Paul and his ‘security team’ who were present throughout and certainly equipped to record video would have filmed them and published the evidence within minutes. There is, as yet no such evidence online. Come on Britain First – here’s a direct challenge for you… produce the evidence. Prove our spotters wrong.

But the whereabouts of the missing evidence isn’t the only unanswered question…

In the past Britain First has published every single bail sheet pertaining to its activities in the hope of demonstrating some mythical persecution by the ‘Muslim-appeasing’ (read ‘not Islamophobic’) establishment. So where’s Jayda’s?

We know that she’s not allowed back to Luton at least until November but what else is on this elusive bail sheet?

Why the relative silence regarding this case on the Britain First website? Apart from a single brief video from Fransen herself there’s been no new publications about the case and nothing from Jayda herself at all. There was one old video posted from February 2016 featuring Paul and Jayda in their ‘makeshift command centre’ (sic) but no further mention of the current case at all. This is very unusual and leads us to speculate that there may well be a social media component to the bail conditions preventing her from doing anything more than make that single report on the outcome of yesterday’s hearing.

Of course- we really don’t know. But if Jayda’s telling the truth then there’s no reason for the Biffers to hold back, is there?

So come on, Britain First- do what you usually do and publish a jpeg of the signed bail conditions. Nobody cares if you want to block out Jayda’s address. We all know her address and postcode anyway. We knew where she lived even before she pretended to be moving out for the benefit of the BBC. We still knew where she lived when she published that same address in respect of the London Assembly elections earlier this year (by which time she should have been long gone) and we still know her address now.

So by all means, blank it out – it makes no difference to us. That’s not what matters. Instead we challenge you to demonstrate that the bail conditions really are as Fransen said they were. Until you do that we will continue to speculate about their true conditions, based upon your own real world and social media activities. It shouldn’t be too hard to work them out, more or less by watching what happens (or doesn’t happen) next.

View from a barstool 28 by Landlord

Beer 2Another lovely week in publand, topped off by an incredibly enjoyable weekend of watching the biffers (and other fash) getting humiliated all over social media. Beers were flowing on Saturday night as the Cricket players looked to win another test match with a big score by Moeen Ali (that’ll confuse the biffers) who kissed the 3 lions as he completed a well earned Century. And also my football team has been taken over by a man who is even richer than Roman Abramovich.

So the biffers… 2 leafleting sessions in Leicester, 2 times kicked out by the police after being countered by Anti Fascists. Added to this, the wonderful news that Goldibollocks got arrested for breaching his bail conditions. No doubt there’ll be a spin on their next video, and how he made the police look like idiots, the 20 unwashed scummy lefteyes (which looked a lot more like 100 or so) were intimidated by him. And the democratically elected mayor of Leicester is an appeaser when he apparently told Goldibollocks and his Security brigade to fuck off.

Well Goldibollocks, when will you learn that everyone is not supporting you, towns don’t want you and you just look as bigger cockwomble than we knew you were? You have minimal support despite your Facebook likes and the good people of this beautiful. diverse. multicultural country have had enough of your buffoonery.

In York, the lovely fellows of National Action turned up, all 15 of them only to be met by Antifa ensuring that their sick message didn’t get spread. These are the cuntwafflers who are under investigation by the German Police for filming themselves at Buchenwald concentration camp giving a Nazi salute. I suppose this is the state of some of our youth today.

Pie and Mash turned up in Dover, all 20 of them, tried to have a demo and again were met by Kent Antifa. Although they took a couple of photo’s which looked like they were being kettled by the police their 5w appears now to mean ‘No One wants you here’.

One thing I have noticed, and it appears so have you guys, is the absence of Screechy the past two weeks. Much conjecture in the office over this and we have had several ideas. I’m sure you have your own thoughts but here are ours:

a) she’s given it all up and entered a nunnery. As such a devout woman she would be welcomed with open arms;
b) she met up with the guy she was flirting with at the ELM a few weeks ago and has converted to Islam;
c) although she gives the bluster and plays the hard girl she’s shit scared of breaking her bail conditions;
d) she’s busy moving home as we all know she has to move every 6 months for security reasons;
e) she’s had enough of being humiliated and is plotting a Screechy takeover with the rest of the high command;
f) she’s taken up Uncle Jim’s invitation and has become the first to become an immigrant in the new far right enclave;
g) she’s gone to rehab.

Whatever it is it does seem strange the poster girl of the far right is absent from the biffers’ latest shennanigans.

Finally, the biffers have issued the fascist equivelant of a fatwa against the democratically elected mayors of various cities, and MP’s who happen to be Muslims. We couldn’t quite believe this to be true in the office but after a while it became apparent that it was. Now hopefully the police can start taking action. If Anjem Choudry is under house arrest for extremism then surely this is the same. It is a direct threat to elected officials of this country and therefore must be very close to terrorism. Even a Tory MP has said that this is an example of the new Home Office edict on extremism.

So thats it. Keep an eye out on the page for where the cockwombles are going to be next week, as soon as we know it will be published. I’m sure wherever it is the people of this country will be out telling them they aren’t welcome.

Now it’s time to clean the BBQ for round 2. Hope you have a great week.

Cheers.

#EggGate: Jayda’s not usually this polite

You can tell when a Britain First neo-nazi knows they’ve been caught out because they try to become uncharacteristically reasonable. We’ve rarely seen Jayda being so polite – but then she’s rarely been caught out so obviously in a forum she can’t control. The problem with Twitter is that you can’t just delete other peoples’ comments the way you can on Facebook. Perhaps that’s why the Biffers have so little support among Twitterers. They’re harder to fool because they can’t easily be silenced. Maybe that’s why Frau Fransen was so polite to this tweeter (whose tweet is being spread far and wide across the Twitter platform as we speak).

BF Jayda Fransen Cadbury Easter 5

What a polite request!

But what exactly was the tweet? It’s becoming known as EggGate in the EBF office in honour of Fransen’s stupendous faux pas. It might be easy enough to fool the Biffers but people who actually visit the shops with their eyes open and their brains engaged are much harder to dupe. Isn’t that right Jayda?

BF Jayda Fransen Cadbury Easter Twitter combo.png

As it happens I went to the shops and took my own little Easter egg picture for Twitter yesterday.

No Easter ban cadbury egg.png

Jayda can’t hold a candle to this Hijabi

We all understand how scary it can be to face down a bunch of thugs who’ve already decided that you’re the enemy, the deserving recipient of their wrath. It’s the scenario that Jayda Fransen plays on to pretend she’d genuinely brave. Fransen brazenly marches into multi-cultural areas intent upon stirring up as much trouble as she can, all the time surrounded by loyal thugs and the police who’ve mysteriously been tipped off by an ‘anonymous caller’ to her presence.

With that sort of protection she’s safe as houses, of course but she pretends to be taking real risks. Not that anyone believes it. But it is a very powerful image. The courageous woman facing down her enemies (in Jayda’s case ordinary people who actually just wish she’d go away) has an inbuilt, instinctive impact upon the rest of society. At least it would if it wasn’t such an obvious sham.

But what of the women who really are that brave? What should we make of them? What should we make of Nargess Moballeghi who genuinely walked into the lion’s den when she attended an EDL rally in Oxford. Now that really does take courage.

Nargess Moballeghi FB

This brave Hijabi, accompanied only by her camera operator walked straight into the heart of an anti Muslim rally by the English Defence League and engaged the fash in real conversation. She didn’t shout or scream, she didn’t insult anyone and she issued no threats. There was no question of her creating a breach of the peace and she needed no bodyguards to hide behind. That’s pretty impressive given the sort of people she’d gone to meet.

Nargess Moballeghi hijabi video 2.png

You can watch a video of her encounter here.

Early on in the video we see a few EDL ‘footsoldiers’ who seemed genuinely to want to discuss the situation with her. Unfortunately they weren’t able to understand most of what she was saying, so indoctrinated were they by the misinformation of their leaders. But they genuinely seemed to try -at least at first. As the wife of a man who these thugs would like to see deported I genuinely was moved to see their attempt at rational conversation.

Nargess Moballeghi hijabi EDL video 3.png

 

Unfortunately, though it didn’t last long. When discussing the issue of Muslim paedophiles Nargess made the obvious point that just as Christian Brits shouldn’t feel the need to go around apologising for Jimmy Savile, neither should Muslim Britons have to apologise for the minority of paedophiles in their ranks. That comparison was a little too close to home for one of the EDL whom she’d managed to engage. Faced with the obviously reasonable and indefensible point the bloke on the right (above) became angry and predictably incoherent. Just as was the case in the infamous EDL ‘Muslim ray guns’ interview it soon became obvious that “There’s a sense of incoherent anger. People are angry but they can’t explain why”.

EDL Muslamic Ray Gun man 2011

As usual the presumably sincere ‘footsoldiers’ have no real understanding of Islam or the reality of British law, Multi-culturalism or even the true nature of Britain’s paedophile problem. They converse in soundbytes and repeat propaganda mantras by rote with little attempt to understand the points raised by this brave Hijabi.

Nargess Moballeghi hijabi video 1.png

As she climbed back into her car to leave her new acquaintances to their ignorance and their lager it was obvious that Nargess had made little impact upon the brainwashed pawns of this divisive game of racial politics. But she did demonstrate one thing…
She’s a damn site more courageous and infinitely more intelligent than Jayda (gob on a stick) Fransen.

Well done Nargess – we stand in awe of your bravery, your dignity and your attempt to understand and engage with those who would see you forbidden from following the faith that is your human right. A right that was hard won by all our ancestors, Muslim and Christian alike just a few decades ago.

A view from a barstool #16

Beer 2So another week spent wondering where the time goes, how one couple almost keep me in business, working out excuses not to go into the EBF office as Hulk and Tank Girl argue about who has nicked the chocolate hobnobs and why nowhere around there sells the correct brand of coffee or has Mint Tea bags! Unfortunately for them I hate serving coffee. If it was up to me and not the Landlady my coffee machine would be disposed of in the skip outside. Talking of being consigned to the bin outside reminds me of the real reason I am writing this blog. Bloody Britain First.

Before I expose them though some other things have caught my eye this week that may or may not be attributed to the Biffers but have a direct connection with their mantra. Firstly the out-pouring of support for a mosque from locals in Bristol. After a seemingly never ending barrage of hate from the far right, cards and flowers have been sent to them showing support from all faiths (and none). Once again proof that the right wing, hate-fuelled idiots don’t have much support anywhere in the country.

Also, a pigs head was stuck to the fence of a Muslim school in Portsmouth. This school is for children in years 1-4 showing again what arseholes those that follow the right wing mantra are. These are just a couple of examples of what groups like the biffers are brainwashing their followers into.

Apart from a couple of meaningless memes rehashed from right wing sources (for example Japan has cut Muslims off from life or whatever), so easy to debunk, so hard for their disciples to understand the lies they put out, only two things really caught my eye. The first was Dutchy and her first “go” on the 15 quid app news studio. Now I’m really sorry and I beg all of you to forgive me but I couldn’t, just couldn’t, not even in the name of EBF force myself to watch it. So I guessed what she said…

BF Jayda Fransen rant immigrants rape january 2016“Screeeeeeeeeech Muslims, Screeeeeeeeech Sharia, Screeeeeech only we can save you, screeeeeeeeeech send money and screeeeeeeeech police and lefty council persecution…”

And that leads me onto the second item of the week, their march in Dewsbury and their visit last week to try and incite the local Muslims into attacking them. Instead they were totally ignored.

We saw Goldibollocks and Dutchy and a group of ‘activists’ with their banners outside two mosques (why oh why do they appear to only do this when there is no one around, or early morning) handed out their edition of Der Sturmer to bemused shoppers, proudly saying that they have had massive interest in the march (which in my eyes means they may get 100 people to shuffle around a car park). They also said on video that they had been attacked. Again given their track record this would have been recorded and flooded the internet (flooded??? remember the sponsored walk chaps, the just giving page is still here) with their propaganda. The police and the local council have called for them to call it off, the local newspaper has too, although they have been called ‘unwashed lefties’.

Why do they call every bit of media lefties???? Is it because anyone who is to the left of Ghengis Khan would still be too liberal?

They are resolute in their decision to shuffle aimlessly and will only do what the police say if a section 12 is issued. They have also said they have a pub all to themselves for a social just after. Now as a Landlord I have contacts and have been looking about along with my unwashed liberal mates trying to find out where. Like I said in an earlier blog, I and the rest of EBF will harry you wherever you may go. Follow this blog and the EBF Facebook page. If I find further details they’ll be announced here.

BF Jayda video Dewsbury front pageSo apart from that, Teflon Goldibolloks and Slimy Dutchy seem to be untouchable, and this to me means one of two things. The powers that be are turning a blind eye to their antics as it fits with their agenda of demonising a faith and keeping their mates in business, or they are a bunch of conniving informants, advising the authorities on the antics of other groups on the right. There is no way the constant harrassment, incitement carried out by the blackshirted shittroopers could be left uninvestigated unless there was something untoward going on.

And finally what ever has happened to pieman Lewis? Other than possibly being on the naughty boys step, could he be writing a book? A great fictional story called Britain (hahaha) First (hahahaha) Accounts (haaaaaaaaaaaaaaa).

BF steve lewis folkestone police morris dancing

And with that, before I fall about laughing again (and get divorce papers served) I must go. I think a white flag has been seen atop EBF towers which either means Tank Girl and Hulk have left the building, the hobnob situation has been sent to arbitration with Yifter and Kit or Ant’s handkerchief has floated out of the window. Keep me covered I’m going in!!!!

Cheers

View from a barstool #10

Beer 2Hello all, a tired and very hungover Landlord travelled back to his pub from Somerset and decided to call in to Hobnob central or more commonly known as EBF towers. After the obligitary telling off for not bringing any oaty snacks as I only had a packet of twiglets and a couple of opal fruits in the car, I started to have a look through what the biffers have got up to.

After 15 minutes of trawling through the absolute lies and intimidatory bullshit through bleary bloodshot eyes I decided my round up this week wouldn’t be a roundup at all but a run through of the last evening that the Antifa Landords came up with during one of our shandy drinking binges (well one of us was drinking lager top). It decended into farce later on but thats another story. But before our session was over we had thought of a wonderful new reality TV program that one of us will send to channel 5, the working title is bigot first.

We found 6 people hungry for cash and media time found a house in one of those Donald Trump no go areas, or Britain as we like to call it, and left the cameras on. When we could be bothered we’d go back and check a) if they were still alive, b)if they had finished the Halal meat we left for them and c)if any of them had used any of the stock bigot phrases yet.

Day one. The introductions of the 6, Dutchy a feisty,somewhat scary woman,Goldibollocks, a suit wearing shouty man, Dim Jowson a bespectacled elderly gent nicknamed “uncle”, Pieman a rather rotund chap, who appears to say he wants to “take the jaws off people” if he’s not keeping the owners of Greggs in toilet paper, little Tommy R or whatever his name may be, he changes it every week, but another shouty man, and finally someone dressed in chainmail, helmet and tinfoil sword who calls himself Kay Tee I or something like it.

After the introductions the contestants went to their Dorms, one for Dutchy and one for the chaps. “I’m not staying in here it would be like the bloody muzzies segregating men and women” she said, “ah” said Uncle and Kay Tee, “but in our sect women are not equal either.”Goldibollocks was heard to say “no christian rumpy here then”.

As we disappeared down the pub, watching a bunch of bigots is not our cup of tea, we heard the beds scraping and the sound of pieman shouting “I’ll take your fucking jaw off if you don’t move these beds so they are facing North, I’m not sleeping facing Mecca” Tommy laughed.

1800, Jayda is in the kitchen making dinner, Uncle said it was her job Kay Tee agreed whilst Pieman wondered if his 50p off voucher at a well known bakers would still be valid when he got out. “I can’t cook this” the harridan screeched “look it’s got HMA on it, our page said not to it’s fucking halalalalalal.” Pieman said “does that mean all of it is, this water, banana, aaaaaaaaaaah it’s a lefty plot Exposing Britain First have left halal hobnobs in here” Tommy said in his best English “fook it I’ll eat it, just don’t tell Pegida or the EDL or the English Democrats or whoever I’m in charge of this week” and so they didn’t eat.

1845 time for bed, the paytrioots decided that as they can’t eat or drink anything as it’s all halal, all they can do is sleep, the production team decided not to tell them all that oxygen is halal too, that would be too funny…..

Day 2, and our bigots are all awake, so hungry that Kay Tee stood guard over them incase Pieman turned to bigot on toast. The production team (I’ll call them EBF for now) decided to send in Muslim kryptonite, a pack of bacon and a couple of crates of Stella, we want to laugh at them not kill them, we’re sympathisers not extremists after all.

EBF BF Big brother Jayda Fransen diary room

1200, Bacon and Stella consumed, EBF called Goldibollocks into the diary room and offered him the chance to meet dutchy in a snooker hall (well room) while the others decorate the room with security windows, panic alarms and give them all black shirts with bodycams on.

1300,  after an hour of “feeling normal” Dutchy and Golding are back with the group, suddenly a dog appears and starts to bark as Uncle begins a sermon and Tommy tries to write another bargain bucket best seller(on sale at poundland in a month) Kay Tee is kneeling waiting to be Templared, Pieman is running round threatening the dog with taking his fucking jaw out, Goldilocks and Dutchy are doing traditional daisy chains on the lawn.

EBF BF Big brother Golding diary room

1500, EBF have decided that all this is a bit nice so send in the first task. Making a nativity scene using only the finest goods from Harrods..although a couple of EDF took the labels off in case the name started a fight. After building the stables and manger, decorating it with straw they began on the disciples, or sheep as we like to call them.

1530, the Dutchy screech is heard…”get these islamic figures out of my nativity scene. They was English I tell ya, not rag ed’s at all and Joseph and Mary were WHIIIIITE!!!!.” Her eyes were bulging. Tommy said “calm down Dutchy” he said “it’s all a lefty plot, they really are just suntanned, not from the Middle East. It’s the same with St George he’s from Peckham really” Uncle continued to rock back and forth quoting the scriptures, Kay Tee is practicing his sword work with his £59.99 sword bending in the wind, Goldibollocks is on the calculator trying to work out how he and Dutchy an afford a trip to bigot land, or Trump Towers as we like to call it.

1531 it starts to rain.

1800, As the rain continues a flood ensues, Uncle tells all who would listen that it is because of the refugees, “it must be true I read it in our bible” he says and pulls out a copy of the Daily Mail.

1825, EBF call pieman into the diary room. After playing sounds of Gaspode barking, he threatens to “take our fucking jaws off” we hand him a letter from the Landlord of the property, Mr Shah who threatens our gallant bigots with eviction if they don’t pay £87 in rent. EBF also gave them a mobile phone to try and raise the cash.

1835, Uncle and Kay Tee have put out an appeal, with a picture saying ” The Templars on a fact finding mission to Serbia, working for you.” Tommy sent an appeal out to the EDL to storm the place but didn’t hold out too much hope as it was a Friday and Kebab and Stella night. Pieman gave his 50p voucher whilst Dutchy and Goldibollocks send a post out to the gullible along the lines of “Lefty plot to stop your leaders from their democratic rights to stay in a house. We have instructed our legal team to take on this lefty plot but you know how expensive this is, we really don’t want to ask you but if you could chip in to help us keep our freedoms. We need £5000 by morning, please dig deep.”

Day 3, Begging update, Uncle and Kay Tee have raised a grand total of nothing, Tommy had a couple of “I love you mate” an offer of a piss up and a chance to write another book, Pieman had raised 50p but his threats to take off a fucking jaw wouldn’t put him good stead. However Goldibollocks and Jayda had made the amount but told everyone they had made nothing, when EBF looked at the history on the phone, Thompsons Holidays was the last entry.

1200, the tension amongst the crowd waiting outside Bigot House is palpable, several police forces sent reinforcements as Bigot first’s events page showed 7500 coming. Numbers are amazing, at least 139 people were there, the police love the overtime.

1205, the Bigots emerge, victory is theirs, Uncle holds his bible aloft, Kay Tee holds his sword, Tommy has a stupid gring on his face, Pieman, spots a kebab van and falls over trying to get there first. Goldibollocks and Dutchy are asking for money for exclusive interviews, except to the lefty media which is everyone apart from the Fail.

1210 the crowd disperses, EBF come out of the house pissing themselves in laughter.

With apologies to whoever does another program on channel 5.
Landlord