View from a barstool #53 by Landlord

Well well well…..Facebook have finally seen sense and banned the biffers page from their social media platform, following twitter.

But hold on a mo, the admins here at EBF are already debating whether to buy expensive champagne or a fiver special from Aldi. Are we out of work, or is this just the beginning of the beginning of the end.

As Screechy and Goldibollocks languish in their Victorian cells (their words not mine) the rudderless fascist ship races towards oblivion. The days of Lewis, Lomax, Carmelo, Besser and Slattery a now distant past and Councillor Bigot and the new gormless ones led by chief mousketeer Andy Edge, (who soon could also be serving time in a rotting jail) trying desperately to keep their magic money tree up. It appears Facebook are dealing a coup de grace to this vile, hate-filled bigoted group as it appears their only money grabbing platform is Facebook.

A new page is already up, Facebook have said they will remove but before they do it appears we can all comment on it. Three years of pent up hate from me will be unleashed when the kids go to bed.

But is it really over? Are we finally seeing the death throes of Britain First? Are we, the admins finally going to get back to concentrating on work, families and having a proper social life? Are we able now to become husbands, wives, mothers and fathers? Well… No. Screechy and Goldibollocks are still about, 36 and 18 weeks ain’t a lot of time. We were hoping years banged up but they aren’t.

So EBF continues until they’ve gone, either fucking off to Fascist enclaves in the Europe they hate or jailed for such a long time they become irrelevant. We’ll still, with your help, chase them, laugh at them and expose them until they decide they’ve conned enough money to fuck off for good.

But for now the ice machine is open the cheap Cava is opened and a celebratory sip is in order. The final push is on!

Cheers

Toodlepip

Libraries forced to remove books after onslaught of complaints

Public libraries all across the UK are set radically to overhaul their bookshelves to avoid offending minorities. The vocal group of objectors, most of whom are unable to read written English (and often struggle with the spoken language too) complain that the presence of so many books in one place just underlines their sense of alienation.

“There used to be a literary tradition in UK, that’s true – but as our people grow in number we’re changing that. There will be no place for books or English literature of any kind in the future we’re hoping to build here in UK.”

The above quoted representative, one of the few who can speak, read and even write English with apparent ease asked not to be named. He did go on to point out that his ability to read and write in English was a source of great embarrassment and he tended to downplay his abilities when among ‘his own people’.

Predictably there has been a backlash against the move with book-lovers comparing it to the infamous ‘book-burnings’ of Nazi Germany. Undeterred the minority anti-book lobby continues to apply pressure and plans to target bookshops in the near future.

“We’re about to mount a big campaign against Waterstones very soon.”

Said our anonymous informant. He even produced a poster to demonstrate the illiterate group’s intentions.

View from a barstool #8.1

At 2pm yesterday, as my faithful barstaff came in to take my place, I heard the news that I had been waiting for for years. Facebook for all their failings on other pages, and allowing some real vitriolic bigotry, threats and downright racist filth had finally seen the light and banned Britain First. Cue delight from the majority of the Anti biffer network and for me to start to get a little bit drunk. But then from euphoria to the case of “hold on a mo” and an immediate request for fighting funds and what is going on. After a couple of pints 2+2 normally makes 5 (I’m useless at darts scoring after a couple) and sure enough within an hour the Biffers returned.

So what was it about, what made Facebook ban the page then give it back. Surely it couldn’t have been Facebook quaking at the thought of Biffer legal department taking them to court, I’m pretty sure they have taken on bigger and badder people. Even though they banned the Biffers when the page came back there were posts on there posted during the ban.

Now I’m not into conspiracy theories but a weekend Biffer meeting, KTI posts being openly shared,then your facebook page gets taken down, to return as if nothing happened except a request for funds to fight the fascists at FB seems to have been prepared in advance.

All in all the answer is simple, Britain First is still going and the fight goes on to take them down. If you haven’t checked go and see if you’re banned again, if not say hello from us (I would but I appear to have been banned again freedom of speech biffer style I suppose).

Six hours later, a fair few pints supped (the bitter tastes bitter after what seemed like victory) I found myself pretty tipsy. So in the words of many a drunk before me I love you all, you’re all my mate you are, I must go….the bins have to go out for collection soon, I just wish we could have been consigning the biffers to them too.