A view from a barstool #34 by Landlord

Well there’s a thing, another week of lovely warm sunshine keeping winter at bay and I’m getting it in the neck from the Landlady for putting away the summer play things in the pub garden, I blame the weathermen who told me it was going to be a short Indian summer.

I have a question to ask. Are you ready for the Biffers silly season? Yep it’s that time again. As Autumn hits our shores the biffers propaganda ministry will go into overdrive. Muslims taking control of government and councils to harm all British patriots’ way of life. Hallowe’en, Remembrance Day, Christmas, the usual shit fuelled by the bastions of truth The Sun, Mail and Express.

So lets have a look at these Great British traditions one by one. These traditions that every year are supposedly shut down by Islamic leaders, every year we see hysterical headlines and social media statuses that are basically either downright lies or twist the story to such a degree that Muslims are made to be the evil ones fuelling an already slow burning hatred that has got worse since the referendum.

Hallowe’en, the day when parents all over the country, who normally wouldn’t let their kids go round knocking on doors or talking to strangers, allow their kids to do just that. This last year was supposedly banned in a lot of areas. It wasn’t in most places and where it was it was the police and councils fearing anti social behaviour. Again we saw headlines in the gruesome threesome and fuelled the hate.

Remembrance day – the day British Patriots adore as once more they can pretend to be more patriotic than the rest of us. Age old stories will be regurgitated, poppies being burnt, Muslims disrespecting the dead, Muslims stopping remembrance marches and Biffers adding security to armed forces cadets selling poppies.

The poppies were burnt, yes but a long time ago, the people doing it were dealt with there and then and they were rightly convicted and fined. It reminds me of the pictures I saw of a certain BNP racist cockwomble wandering around the cenotaph with a pair of Y-fronts om his head. If you havent seen this before this arsewipe has become leader of a “registered political” party.

Our memes last year documented the hundreds of thousands of Muslims who died protecting our freedom. Their relatives must be wondering why right now.

Finally, on Remembrance Day , or at least on the run up to the day Goldibollocks tells his shit troopers to go and “protect” the army of cadets who collect money for veterans from the hordes of lefties and Muslims that are out to desecrate the memories of the fallen. Except they don’t protect…..they hide away until any adults have gone off then get a selfie with the cadets, place it on Facebook and the dickwads that follow the page eat it up. The Biffers respect our fallen so much they sell tat, dressed up as British Legion merchandise and pocket the money for their own grubby means.

A friend of the page, John McKnight has been asking Goldibollocks where the money raised has gone. Ask yourself the question then, who disrespects the fallen more, Muslims, lefties, Foldibollocks or the biffers.

Finally Christmas, I don’t think there is a day goes by in November or December that a headline in the gruesome threesome, a meme or a link to an ultra right wing think tank that doesn’t say CHRISTMAS GETS CANCELLED. Now I don’t like Christmas apart from my coffers bulging but each to their own. The Muslims I know celebrate the day, maybe not as christians do but still give presents, invite friends for a cocktail or three (grrr not spending in my gaff) and generally enjoy the time as much as a certain grumpy landlord. Also, in the afternoon, Naz opens his store for forgotten things and fags. The reasons lights, decorations or trees don’t go up is not Muslims, grumpy landlords or athiests it’s because councils can’t afford it, health and safety or a myriad of other reasons.

MUSLIMS DO NOT WANT TO CANCEL CHRISTMAS!

But it doesn’t matter to Biffers. Any article in the propaganda sheets will be siezed upon and twisted for their own gain to keep the anti Muslim sentiment going.

I would offer a packet of toffee chocolate hobnobs if you manage to see a positive article about any of these but I checked EBF coffers and we seem only to have half a packet of midget gems, two packets of quavers, a bottle of Lambrini and a packet of hummus.

Now back to the job, putting back up the climbing frame, swings and benches…..wheres my hammer.

Toodlepip