Welcome to LBC Radio covering the Mayoral election. Today our presenter, Katie Hopkins interviews Screechy Fransen of Britain First.
- Welcome to my show, Screechy. How does it feel to be the second most hated woman in Britain after me?
- Look you old slapper, I’m hated more, look at our name…..Britain First, it should really be Screechy First because I’m taking our country back. As it says in the bible I am the leader you have to follow.
- Screechy, I hate the muzzies as much as you do and refugees even more, if you get into the London Assembly how are you going to stop all this nonsense?
- Well Katie, once Goldibollocks is crowned Emporer and I am sitting in the Assembly as chief Harriden we will begin the systematic withdrawal of all Muzzies and refugees. We will build a wall and then kick them out. London will be for white British only. As it says in the bible “We shall fight them on the beaches”.
- Thats a bit extreme even for me there Screechy. What about the Indians….
- Well they came from America in the first place they can have them all back, although that would annoy our backers in America so maybe Anglesey will be better for them. As it says in the bible “Set sail those non believers to hell”
- You preach outside East London Mosque. How do you manage not to be scared?
- Well what we do is phone the police when we arrive and tell them that there is an awful kerfuffle outside so the police come out and protect us from the Muslim hordes. As it says in the bible “Smite them”
- Your Mayoral literature shows that you live at the same address as Goldibollocks, do you have fluffy cushions and matching curtains?
- Does it? And ‘no’. It’s all crosses and Union Flag decorations. Hail Mary’s and all that too. As the bible said “Thou shall not live in sin unless you are doing Brians work”.
- You used to belong to another wonderful group, the EDL who love their work. Why did you leave?
- Well, Katy as the bible says “They’re splitters“. I left because Uncle Jim thought I should come on board the good ship Money First, oops sorry Britain First and con gullible shits out of their money. He promised me riches, a boob job and patriot holidays and you know what… it’s all come through. In the EDL, fucking splitters, all I got was a can of Stella and my bum groped.
- The unwashed lefties have ripped apart your manifesto saying you are a racist organisation and nothing in your pledges mean anything to the people of London.
- The gallows are being built now for the lefties, do not worry. They are being killed along with anyone that doesn’t agree with the Emperor and I, the high Priestess. As it says in the bible “No more Mosques, ban the burka and no to Halal foods.”
- That doesn’t really answer the question but I do agree with everything you say. What about refugees….
- as it says in the bible, “If you mention Jehovah – stone them”.
- Not drastic enough if you ask me. What about you as a woman so high up in a political party when some say that you are just eye candy.
- Well as it says in the bible “Women have a perfect right to play a part in our movement, Reg”.
- Is there anything else you wish to add, Screechy because I know you need to get back to your bunker to plan more inciteful displays.
- When I am in power there will be crosses for everyone. As it says in the bible “We’re giving Pilate two days to dismantle the entire apparatus of the Roman imperialist state, and if he doesn’t agree immediately, we execute them”.
- Well, thank you screechy
(With apologies to upstanding Christians everywhere)